Why people behave the way they do


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This topic contains 12 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Better off facing reality 5 days, 23 hours ago.

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  • #756772 Reply

    Stephen

    The root cause of all poor,inconsiderate,rude,unpleasant,angry,greedy,lazy and hateful behaviour is a split mind. What is a split mind and how does it come about? First it is important to realise that a split mind does solely mean a mind split in two. There can be any number of splits in a mind. A split should be thought of like a wound. Every time you do something you don’t want to do or you feel some action you do because you feel compelled by an outside force causes a split in the mind of it becomes habitual.
    For example consider work. You said up each work day and groan. One part of your mind absolutely doesn’t want to get up and go off to work. This part wants to stay in bed for several more hours and has no desire whatsoever to go to the workplace which it hates with a passion. However their is another part of the mind equally strong which demands that you get up and go to work. This part says:’if you stay in bed you will lose your job and soon you won’t have a house or even a bed to sleep in.’ This part of the mind usually wins,but the other part still remains there in the background and won’t be denied. If it can’t act openly it will seek expression covertly through doing the bare minimum at work,sniping and gossiping at and with colleagues and doing a half-ass job. It also seeks expression at home through being dissatisfied and resentful of your spouse and children.
    The wife thinks:’If only Bob would work longer and harder we could have a nicer life. Why won’t he try and get that big promotion?’. Bob thinks:’That Marcy if she would just stop spending my money on stupid things like toilet seat covers I wouldn’t need to work so hard and I’d be more relaxed and pleasant to be around’.
    When the mind is split there can be very little consistent behaviour. A man who is dissatisfied with his home life creates a profile on a dating website. He neglects to mention that he is married or in an established relationship. So he starts chatting to women online being either evasive or telling outright lies agreeing to dates,flying across country etc. However because his mind is split one part never predominates for long. The other side of the split will manifest. Imagine again the man above chatting,lying taking about the future etc. After a while he will start to think:’you are shamefully receiving this woman. She thinks that you to might have a future when you know very well that won’t happen because she’ll find out the truth,that you are married/have a girlfriend and/or you and not the man she thinks you are. You must stop contacting this woman,but since somehow you agreed to go on a date you must NOT turn up.’. However because of his split mind he is soon back to contacting her giving semi-plausible explanations for him not flying across country or showing up for the date. In his split mind one part wants to continue the charade while the other doesn’t both are equally strong but only one of these moods can be in the driving seat at any one time.
    How to heal the splits in the mind? First become very aware of who or what is currently in the driving seat of your mind at any one time. Second start practicing complete 100% honesty with yourself and others i.e.’if it isn’t true don’t say it and if it isn’t [morally] right don’t do it’.I
    Going against your instincts or sense of self repeatedly is what caused splits(wounds) in the mind. Seeing them then then starving them of attention along with meditation will in time cause all splits in the mind to heal.

    #756774 Reply

    Stephen

    Sorry for the typos above auto-correct loved to change things and often changes what I changed back into the wrong word.

    I don’t want to give the impression that I am above all this that I don’t have a split mind. My mind is split along gender lines. Some part of my mind says:’stop all this woman nonsense. Whoever heard of a 6’4″ woman? No one will take you seriously! So just stop it!’
    You can usually tell when that part is dominant here as this part likes to be dismissive of women’s problems. However there is another part of my mind that says:’While you can do nothing about your height you feel what you feel. You know if it were at all possible you would become a woman without the slightest hesitation!!’ This part of my mind is also seen here when I wrote kind and consoling posts and I am genuinely concerned about the problems women here face. So this veering back and forth is the classic sign of a split mind.

    #756776 Reply

    SMH

    WTF???

    If you were so “genuinely concerned about the problems women on this site face”, you wouldn’t be dumping the schizophrenic nonsense you dump here. You and certain other people who comment here regularly aren’t helping, you’re harming people who innocently come here in pain looking for help. You need help off this site and it would be so much better for you if you went and got it instead of wasting so much of your valuable time posting here. It’s unfair to make others suffer because you’re acting out here. Stop avoiding yourself by being here all the time. Because that’s what you’re doing by focusing so much on others: avoiding yourself. It’s like watching soap operas. People who are addicted to those get to avoid their own lives. You’re doing the same.

    #756796 Reply

    Jordan

    What a load of crap! No one on here cares about this stuff. You obviously copied this from a textbook verbatim.

    Please get a life!

    #756832 Reply

    chaotic emotional torando

    Its being dissatisfied with your own life and trying to contol everything to fit it neatly in a box. When life is chaos and you have NO CONTROL over what a person says, does, or how they react to it. When it doesn’t go in your favor, you throw a hissy fit about it, and make life difficult for the other party until you get your way. It has nothing to do with a split mind but your need to be in control of the outcome. When your control is just an illusion.

    Do us a favor and stay out of the woman’s mind. You clearly do not understand it or try to. It seems you just want to force your way in and do your best to destroy it.

    #756844 Reply

    Better off single

    The root cause of poor, inconsiderate, rude, unpleasant, angry,greedy,lazy and hateful behaviour is the conditioning of your mind

    or someone pushing the limits of another person until they can not take it anymore. Even the sweetest, kindest, most considerate people have their limits.

    #756845 Reply

    Get out of my mind im fed up

    What split-brain patients can tell us about consciousness
    When we listen to music, our brains naturally integrate the lyrics and the melody into one cohesive song. But to patients missing a crucial connecting structure in the brain, a song is made up of two components – music and lyrics – which remain distinct in their minds.

    These people lack something called the corpus callosum, which is a structure that connects the brain’s two hemispheres. This connector is crucial because the right and left hemispheres often have different specializations. For example, music processing occurs more in the right hemisphere, while language processing is more prominent in the left hemisphere. Therefore, split-brain patients who lack the corpus callosum, due either to its failure to develop or to surgery for severe epilepsy, perceive the world in a completely different way than we do.

    When split-brain patients are asked to listen to two different songs, one in each ear, and then repeat what they hear, something interesting happens: they repeat the lyrics of the song they heard in their right ear, and repeat the melody of the song that played in their left ear. Imagine you are wearing a weird set of earphones that plays two different songs, one in each earbud. In the right one, “Masterpiece” by Jessie J is playing. In the left one, it’s St. Lucia’s “Elevate”. If your corpus callosum is intact, you’ll hear a confusing jumble of Jessie J’s powerful lyrics and St. Lucia’s catchy tune. But if your brain’s hemispheres are not connected, you may hear the lyrics of “Masterpiece” layered on top of just the tune of “Elevate”. The melody of “Masterpiece” and St. Lucia’s lyrics will magically disappear.

    Since the left ear is connected to the right hemisphere and the right ear is connected to the left hemisphere, the likely explanation for this is that when the song presented in the left ear projects to the right hemisphere, the brain mainly perceives the melody. In the same way, the left hemisphere focuses on the lyrics of the song in the right ear, due to its language specialization. Therefore, split-brain patients may feel as if they are hearing one song composed of the lyrics heard in the right ear and the melody heard in the left ear, instead of a confusing jumble of two songs that people with normal corpus callosums would hear. This curious experience that split-brain patients have shows us the corpus callosum’s crucial role in integrating the tune and lyrics of songs by connecting the two hemispheres.

    Further research on the behavior of split-brain patients has revealed that the left hemisphere has dominant control over speech. This is a problem in split-brain patients because what they say may be uninformed by the information processed in the right hemisphere. Imagine that the word “beach” is presented to the right hemisphere of a split-brain patient. When asked to choose a picture that best represents summer from among several choices, the patient is likely to choose a picture of a beach. So far, this makes sense. But when the subject is asked why they chose the image of a beach over other images of things such as sunglasses, a swimming pool, or ice-cream, they will make up an explanation, like the fact that they saw a poster of a beach earlier that day. They are not intentionally lying. They do this because the left hemisphere, which controls the content of speech, is uninformed by the fact that the right hemisphere saw the word “beach” before choosing the image. This tells us that the left hemisphere is not only in charge of our mouth but also that it attempts to make a plausible narrative that explains our actions.

    Observing the behavior of split-brain patients has offered a deeper understanding of the corpus callosum’s crucial role of integrating the information in the left and right hemispheres to create a coherent understanding of our surroundings. The left hemisphere’s dominant control over speech leaves us with many future topics of research, including the topic of consciousness. Given that a lot of our consciousness is made up of interpreting our actions and our surroundings, it seems plausible that the narrative-making role that the left hemisphere plays in split-brain patients is associated with consciousness. It remains to be seen whether there are specific areas in the brain’s left hemisphere that are responsible for making narratives. If so, studying patients with lesions in that area of the brain has the potential to shed light on what life may look like with diminished awareness, and thereby solidify our understanding of the nature of consciousness.

    #756846 Reply

    Get out of my mind im fed up

    Article by Yuki Hayashi

    #756851 Reply

    Better off single

    I really, truly, from the bottom of my heart wish only peace love happiness and all good things for you stephen. I hope you find it someday.

    #756855 Reply

    Why is a raven like a writing desk?

    @smh and @jordan

    Hurting people HURT people. I underatand that a lot better hanging out on this forum. So spouting hateful words at a hurting person only confirms the hurt they feel inside to be true. Even if you are just a stranger who’s opinion really doesn’t matter either way anyway.

    I do my best to avoid hurting people to avoid being hurt. I still get hurt. The only answer to helping a hurting person is to be patient and loving. That’s not even a good answer to it because said person starts to think its ok to continue hurting you because you just accept the abuse. When and how to make a hurting person realize this isn’t acceptable without guilt tripping them or making them feel worse about themselves or becoming bothered by it is a problem i havent found a solution for yet.

    Stay humble and know who you are. Be around this person less i guess is the best answer.

    #756857 Reply

    Modern Myth

    The man seeking attention outside of his marriage is a selfish man living in fantasy land trying to escape reality for a temporary solution to a problem he resfuses to acknoledge in his marriage.

    Not a man with a split mind. Maybe a man who wants to live a double life.

    The innocent naive victim he chooses simply for what she looks like and not for who she is suffers for the creative lies he tells her and holds on longer than she has to because he keeps contacting her filling her with false hope by spouting off dumb excuses and wants to continue feeding his own fantasy. It’s like getting high.

    Nothing feels better than getting a hit when your feinding for one and once you get it, you’re satisfied and feeling guilty because you told yourself you were going to quit. The guilty feeling goes away when you get your next hit. Then you tell yourself, i just spent $60 a gram. “No way im tossing it. I’ll quit when it’s gone.” When it’s gone, you will maybe get through a day or two. When withdrawls kick in, you pawn your guitar and hit up your dealer for another $60 worth of product.

    It’s refusing to accept reality and deal with it by pushing through that tough time to make it better. Nobody can make you. Its a decision you have to make on your own.

    Not constantly repeating over and over the same patterns hoping the temporary solution will be the solution. It wont. Be honest with yourself as much as you want to. You wont solve the problem ruminating over it. It’s taking action and accepting the consequences when you are wrong and growing/learning from it. Going through the pangs by practicing some self-control and not doing it anymore.

    The veering back and forth is refusal to accept that you are a man because you don’t want to be one.

    Going against your instincts or sense of self repeatedly is the desire for something you can’t have or be. Not a split mind. You’re miserable by thinking you will never have satisfaction in this life because of the 1 thing that you can’t have or be. Sure, get a sex change. You will still be a man. You will still find something that leaves you unsatisfied and won’t ever be happy with it.

    Accept what is, change what you can (yourself not other people), and you will be satisfied.

    #756892 Reply

    Omg

    Only BOS would even bother having a dialogue with Stephen.

    #756917 Reply

    Better off facing reality

    I really like how his posts get me thinking and it isnt all about “does he like me?” “Why isnt he texting me back?” “My fwb and I blah blah blah.” When they already know the answer.

    Im a sucker for psychoanalysis.

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