When is it time to move on?

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This topic contains 5 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  redcurleysue 10 months, 3 weeks ago.

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  • #656185 Reply


    I have been talking to/seeing this guy for about 5 months. We spent a good amount of time together this summer, but then I moved away for grad school. We’ve talked every day since my move, and have agreed to see each other when I’m home. As we’ve gotten to know each other more, I’ve started seeing that he’s not the type of person I see myself ending up with (i.e. cancels plans all the time, makes fun of me for hanging out with my family, condescending, etc.). I just don’t see my fundamental values lining up with his. Despite this, I like talking with him and have come to realize i have feelings for him, which is why it’s hard for me to think about ending this. Also, with being a new city it’s nice to have someone to talk to at the end of the day, and I’ve come to find my nightly talks with him as a source of comfort. I know regardless of my feelings, I don’t want to us to become a couple. Any advice for when its just time to call it quits? Or how to move on from someone you have feelings for? Or how to end a non-relationship? Or how to become strong enough to be on my own? Thanks!!!

    #656187 Reply


    Now is the time to move on

    You don’t want to be used by someone one day right?

    #656189 Reply


    End it now! How can you have feelings for him when he doesn’t respect you or your value? Find someone else at grad school to talk to and spend more time on your homework. Next time you talk with the jerk, tell him you don’t want to see or hear from him anymore as you’re not going to put up with his condescending ways and disrespect for your values. Geez, find your self respect and move on!

    #656194 Reply


    Dump this guy (respectfully) and find some friends on meetup.com

    I had a co-worker I liked talking to (just friendly, nothing datey) and he laughed at me when I couldn’t find my key and then my phone. But in a very blatant, obnoxious way because I can usually take a bit of mockery quite well. It really put me off him as a person to talk to even. So I’m not sure how you can keep ‘dating’ someone who disrespect fundamental parts of you that are nothing but wonderful even (spending time with family etc).

    I’d let this one go ASAP.

    #656198 Reply


    As soon as you realize you see no future with a guy and/or he’s disrespectful it’s time to move on!!!

    #656203 Reply


    Well, if he expects to be romantic with you then you have to break it clean and fast. It is not fair to him to keep him wondering if you want to spend your future with him in the picture…you are stopping him from meeting the possible love of his life.

    It is simple if this is the case, just tell him you have been thinking about the two of you and realize you are not a match…you are not peanut butter and jelly. It has been nice, and there are things you will miss, but it is over.

    As for loneliness, hey, there are thousands of groups online. There are hundreds of women and men who want friendships…just reach out…invite someone to lunch for a chat…every time, and I mean every time I have reached out I have made a friend. People respond to an open hand and an open heart.

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