What should I do?

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This topic contains 6 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Kim 6 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #757567 Reply


    I met this guy online, he was living away but was gonna spend a few days in my country during his leave and then permanently move back here after some time. We really clicked, had a great connection, chatted every day for two months and sent pictures to each other. We planned in advance to meet me while he ll be here. He had two days off in my city. The day has come, he arrived was chatting to me, telling me what he does, not mentioning about our meeting, but said he went out last night and got really drunk. I felt really dissapointed cause, he didnt follow through and also didnt even mention our meeting or apologize that he cant. I messaged him and said I feel slightly dissapointed and thought that after those two months he ll find some time for coffee or drink with me and said I really like when men follow through with his plans. He apologised and said he didnt plan party last night and that I have rights to be mad. I unfriended him from social media and deleted his number, as I think it was waste of time, especially I know he followed a few other girls, so maybe he picked another one to meet even if not, then I think he should at least message me that he cant or if he really wanted he would find some time dont you think? Do you think it was too drastic that I cut him off or what should I do?

    #757569 Reply


    he appears to be a time waster. u did right. after you told him you were disappointed that he dint make any attempt to meet, he still didn’t make plans. what else do u need?

    #757570 Reply


    No, he hasnt… He will be back soon, as he is doing some travels at the moment, but even if he wants to meet I feel like I shouldn’t give him any chance.

    #757573 Reply


    What is wrong with women chatting for months with a man she can’t even date? Meet someone local and stop the madness. Most men meeting women long distance do so because they just want attention and usually already have someone as a gf or wife.

    #757585 Reply


    do not bother or engage with him any more. if he was genuinely interested in meeting you he would have made definitive plans with you and not get drunk with others. hey do not give this man any more space in ur head. chuck it.

    #757711 Reply


    I know, its just I kinda of need to reconfirm that I did right.

    #757763 Reply


    You responded perfectly by cutting him off for his behavior towards you. You two made a plan to meet. His actions made it clear his words didn’t have meaning. This tells a lot about where his head is in dating at this time and how he treats potential dates. Him talking to you while he was there but not saying anything about meeting demonstrated just how casually he could disregard you and your time. He only apologized after you called him out. Sorry to say, but his apology was paper thin. There was no weight to it since it only came after he found out you weren’t going to act like all was good.

    If you hadn’t cut contact he would most likely try to contact you when he was nearby again if things were more convenient for him at that time. You don’t want to engage with someone who doesn’t follow through with plans, doesn’t find it important enough to notify you when a plan changes on his end, or treats you with a take it or leave it attitude, do you? If your response is, “NO WAY!” then there is your answer to if you did the right thing for yourself… you did.

    I’m sure he liked you well enough and was attracted to you. That makes not following through even worse. That says he can enjoy engaging with you and still not feel the need to practice even basic courtesy. Who needs enemies with friends like that?

    Put him behind you. You deserve and can do far better!

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