This topic contains 2 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Im living in hell 4 weeks ago.
August 20, 2019 at 8:35 am #760720
– Someone making problems out of things I never saw a problem with until it became one because of the other person making a problem out of it. When it’s none of their business to begin with.
-pressure to do better or be a better person when I’m already giving it all I’ve got.
-being observed like a lab rat.
-people talking negatively about me.
-not knowing who to trust or what to believe
-feeling powerless, weak, hopeless, and alone
And with the people who are in my life that I seem to be stuck with making me feel this way, I’d much rather be alone.August 20, 2019 at 10:44 am #760732
Hi Not sure I should do this but trying some things helps. it sounds a bit like what ive been through and Ive learnt to ignore and not bother. I still love my husband but the choice is his. I tried, but you cant push the negative, we can only hope and Pray it gets better with time. And alot I did not know until now. So yeah we live and learn.
But dont put yourself down there are better people out there and willing to show you the love and caring and attention you deserve.
Id rather be with my husband then live with family. and as they say better the dog you know then the one you dont. trust me. We better off with the person that really loves you back then some people who just judge and hate.
A friend!August 20, 2019 at 4:40 pm #760761
Im living in hell
I’d rather not settle and go my own way. I’ll find someone someday it’s not something I’m actively looking for and in no hurry to get.
I would rather not have people in my life who make me feel insecure, give me doubts, or build me up just to push me right back down again, separate me from others, or push their views in my face and call the sh×it therapy.
I have no problem ignoring them until they f×ck with my head and stress me out emotionally. It’s really hard to function some days. I just want them out of my life and they refuse to go. There’s nothing I can do about it either. I dont understand why they wont go when I’ve asked over 1000 times. Half the s×it they do to me is totally uncalled for and really stresses me out. I can’t even enjoy music like i used to and that makes me so sad. most days my head is filled with self defeating thoughts caused by their actions and words i want to put my kids up for adoption and go kill myself. Its like no matter what i do I cant win. My kids really deserve a better life that I can’t seem to provide for them alone. I’m not going to put up with someone who is controlling or abusive just so my kids can have their own room and things they want. Its bad enough my parents are that way. I have nowhere else to go.
I want to be loved, valued, and appreciated not treated like trash, used for sex and shelter, or a test dummy.
I don’t want to be watched, criticized, or put under a microscope. I don’t feel safe or trust people who do that. They will use that information against me and turn it around on me like I’m the problem. Im sick of it.
I’m not self absorbed. I’m minding my own business, doing my best and them added into the mix is just a struggle and i really want nothing to do with them because their actions toward me are mean spirited and controlling.
I keep telling myself it could be so much worse and im thankful it isn’t. I foucus on all the things im thankful for. Right now i just feel so lost, confused, and defeated. I just dont know how much more of this sh×it i can take.
Thanks for the kind words.