Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Turned off by new guy
- This topic has 8 replies and was last updated 3 years, 10 months ago by
tammy.
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Yasmine
Hey guys so i met this new guy online and we were flirting back and forth for a while (around a month and a half_because lockdown_😌) at first i thought i really liked him but then when we talked on the phone and later had a date i feel like i have been mistaken..
Now let me tell you something, i’ve never felt this way about a guy, he’s everything i could look for he fits all the criteria in my list he’s nice, young(26), good looking, generous but best of all he wants something serious and commited!! Which i thought was great for me since most men i meet only want me for sex!
But still something seems to be off, the way he’s moving forward way too soon ( we met a few days before my birthday, he baked me a cake and got me a gift, he even gave me his netflix password wtf😑)
I don’t know he talked alot about his ex of 6years when we were in the getting to know each other phase he said she was too jealous and clingy(they broke up two months ago but they had gaps before too).. After we met he suddenly started talking about mariage and babies like i want that too but isn’t it too soon?? .. he also posted our picture together on facebook story🤦♀️
He doesnt like video chatting much and he never even brought up the sex subject i sometimes try turning him on undirectly but no help.. stone cold lmao he sounds so childish to me tbh he has this annoying voice on the phone omg..
He wants to watch a movie together on the phone smh 🤦♀️ like ok maybe in a few months when we run out of things to say.. he talked to his brother about me today who lives abroad 😖 yes yes! ( it’s been barely two weeks since we’ve started getting serious)
I feel so turned off and disapointed because he seemed like a great guy and now i don’t know what to do like am i just reading too much into it? should i work through these annoying little things or should i just drop him.. (knowing that it’s hard for me to find someone that serious)Andrea
I can’t say for sure but in my experience guys that move fast on to you, typically move on to other girls just as quickly..the second experience I’ve had with men like this is that they’re terribly emotionally manipulative. They make you feel bad about wanting to move on. He could genuinely be a nice guy but if you’re already turned off then perhaps you can move on..if you’re still curious stick around and just observe. Good luck!
Lane
Yeah, I would be running for the hills. If you have all these flags waving, so early, its your gut instinct telling you to run. Run!
Yasmine
@Andrea ikr it’s ridiculous but he said he met alot of girls but he never felt so serious about one usually until months after.. 🤷♀️
@Lane
God i want to, so turned off i’m just scared i might regret it since it’s so hard for me to find someone seriousNewbie
Yasmine, your gut is telling you loud and clear there are things off about him. I think the reason of his break up, him being jealous and clingy are two of the important ones, plus he seems to want an insta relationship. And of course no physical interest. All big no-no’s. Dont doubt yourself, just tell him you dont feel the chemistry to move on
kaye
I would say I’ve seen guys like this before. They get out of a serious relationship and in only a couple weeks or months they rebound with a girl trying to fit her into an insta-relationship as Newbie said! They don’t want to feel the pain of the loss of the prior relationship so they think they can just insert a new woman into the space left empty by the last and voila it will be fine! That’s why everything seems so fast, wanting a serious relationship, talking marriage, babies, baking you cakes and giving you gifts for your birthday after only a couple weeks. This guy was in a 6 year relationship and he craves that emotional closeness so he forces it with the first girl that comes along. Then a few months from now when all the emotions hit him he’s been stuffing down and ignoring he will start distancing himself, tell you he’s not ready for a serious relationship, it’s me not you, and blah, blah, blah.
He’s only 26 and been in a relationship since he was 20. He needs to deal with this breakup and grow from it. If you stay you will be the rebound, and get hurt. I would never date a guy only 2 months out of a serious relationship of 6 years unless I was just looking for fun and a good time and not a serious long term relationship.
redcurleysue
Run.
Yasmine
You guys are probably right.. thanks alot for clearing some things out for me, i will work by your advice and end it.
Peacetammy
something feels off. so don’t get rushed into things. and take your time.
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