Told Guy I like him a lot but I dont want to be disappointed, time to move on?

He doesn’t sound like a romantic interest, just sounds like a buddy?! If you like him more than that i would move on. You are just gonna get your feelings hurt if you continue to hang out with him.

This is a future benchmark you need to use with men, whereas, you need to double the bar.

I’m going to tell you story, although not verbatim, I read it in an article awhile back to give you a birds eye view of how men date today so you don’t keep stumbling through the dating minefield:

There was an old man sitting on a park bench when a young man with a young lady came by and sat down next to him. The old man engaged in some chit chat, where the young lady excused herself and left. The old man after more chit chat eventually asked the young man “what are your intentions with that pretty young lady?”. The young man was confused by his question and replied “I don’t understand what you mean?” The old man confused by his answer replied “back in our day we spent time with ladies for the intention of marrying her, is she someone you would consider marrying?” The young man thought about it for a few seconds and replied “I never thought of dating a woman for that reason.”

In a nutshell, men don’t date women today for a relationship or marriage, they are primarily interested in wasting some time (aka “timekeepers” or “timewasters”) before they move onto another, usually when the lady wants MORE, such as a relationship, they never intended to offer her.

His lack of words not only CLEARLY told you but was CLEARLY showed you through his lazy actions of bailing, and popping in and out at his pleasure, he had zero intention of taking you anywhere but the road to NSAville—No Strings Attached town. The way you properly evaluate/vet a man is WORDS + ACTIONS = TRUTH. If *he’s* not talking about it after 2 – 4 dates, then he’s NOT thinking about it!

Pretending to be “a cool girl” will get you nowhere; however BEING “the cool girl” (look it up) will get you to a better destination. A *true cool girl* doesn’t jump whenever a man texts or plans something with her, nope she has other prospects (men) on her dating roster and doesn’t give any of them special attention or treatment until he’s proven to her, over a good amount of time (month or two), that’s he’s not yanking her chain and is truly vying for her heart because she’s already captured his. Any man who gives her wishy-washy treatment (such as the guy above) is automatically removed from the dating roster because she has several other contenders vying for her attention so doesn’t see the purpose of wasting her time on those losers. Nope, the cool girl takes her sweet time deciding which one would make the BEST overall partner/mate/husband, for HER because HE has *proven* to her what a great mate (aka “husband”) he would make! Learn how to be that girl :o)

In a nutshell, any man can be a BF but it doesn’t mean they will make a good husband and especially a good father! If you’re wanting children then its your job to get them the best daddy for them—one who will provide, protect, mentor and teach them life skills and be a great partner/teammate for you too—-a win-win. If your reaching the age where you are starting to feel ready to settle down, now is the time to STOP looking at the small/short-term picture (lust/infatuation) and start looking at the BIG/LONG-TERM PICTURE (parenthood/life partner) and you’ll hopefully start upping the bar on the men you choose to spend your time with, and stop wasting your time with flakes, losers, and poor long-term bets.

@Lane–your story is spot on how guys date these days. 99.9% of the time, guys are not dating with the intention of a relationship let alone to find a wife. Guys mostly date for short-term companionship and casual sex. To them they think, “why settle down with one, when I can have plenty and never get bored or have any responsibility to any one of them”.

Lalaland,
This guy was just passing the time with you. I know that hurts, it’s happened to us all. In the world today, there is no need for guys to grow up. In fact, a lot of guys fear marriage because it signals loss of freedom, major responsibility, and God forbid they get divorced and run the chance of losing all kinds of money and having to pay child-support for years and years. I’ve heard it over and over from many guys, “Marriage isn’t for men, it’s for women.” It sucks so many think this way.

Sorry not trying to be a downer, it’s a hard truth to learn.