Should i date my friend’s ex girlfriend


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  • #823333 Reply
    T.G.

    Hello, so recently im in a bit of a pickle and i want to ask for advice. So basically im really close friends with one of my best friend’s(gonna call him M) girlfriend(gonna call her P), we can go out with P, just the two of us, even without M, and there are no problems. I’ve never had a thing for her, and they have been dating for 6 years. Recently they broke up, M dumped P in a really rough way, basically he wasnt happy with her for a very long time but didnt have the balls to say it.
    And now im starting to think – could we start dating with P? Because we are really really close friends, we get along, we dont argue over anything, we always have a good time together, overall i like how she is on the outside and on the inside.
    The thing is that i dont want to risk my friendship with M, or my friendship with P. I already told P that i have a thing for her, and she was a bit shocked, and said she couldnt give me an answer currently. The thing is that she is having casual sex with a colleague, in her words: “To forget about M”. It really hurts me knowing she is f**** some random idiot, who is inferior to me, physically and mentally, but i cant make her stop having sex with him, and i dont have the right to stop her because she is single after all.
    At the end of our conversation she asked me if i wanted to kiss her to find out if i really have something for her, but i declined firstly – because i have said to myself that i wont do anything with her witout M’s permission, and secondly – because i know she is currently in a weakened mental state and doesnt know what she is doing, so this could have messed up our friendship.
    So the question is – what do i do now? Do i continue trying to start someting with her, or is it too risky for our friendship, which is the most important thing for me, even if we dont start dating i wont be mad.

    #823361 Reply
    LnJ

    I’ve been in a similar situation. Initiating dating with a friend’s ex can lead to awkwardness and outright drama.

    But honestly? The way you describe the situation makes it seem like you are developing an infatuation with her. I don’t think that is a good idea. I think you need to let go of the idea of dating her. Enjoy the friendships that you have.

    #823367 Reply
    mama

    1. They dated for 6 years. Wait at least 6 months [MINIMUM] for her to heal, for her to stop using f**kboys for rebounds and then if you still have feelings for her…
    2. Talk to your friend M and see if he has any issues with you asking her out.
    3. If not, then ask her out.

    I’d let go of it for now though. If you don’t want to ruin the friendship, respect the fact that she’s not in a good place, post-breakup. No one truly is.

    #823420 Reply
    Raven

    No, No, No & Never…

    How do you think this is not horribly wrong?!

    #825437 Reply
    Jess

    Think of it this way. My friend’s are like my sisters to me and I wouldn’t date my sisters ex. If you think of your friend like a brother would you date your brother’s ex?

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