Need mommy's boy advice

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This topic contains 5 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Nellie 6 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #757100 Reply


    So I think I am married to a mama’s boy.

    We currently live abroad for a set period of one year due to my husband’s work. I have lived abroad for 10 years, this is his first time living abroad. For the summer holidays, I came back to Europe where we both live, 6 weeks earlier to do some temporary work. My husband returns next week and I am obviosuly excited to reunite after 6 weeks apart. However, he told me that he needs to go to his sister’s in a town 2 hours away the following day he arrives together with his family and stay the night. This gives us NO private time together until maybe Sunday if I am lucky. He arrives on Friday morning and I finish work in the evening. Meanwhile I stay in my old rental apartment, he is expected to live with his needy parentsTo add, I am 8 weeks pregnant, and we have not seen each other since I announced the pregnancy when I had arrived to Europe. To add a few things:

    – His mother feels so sorry for herself cause she only gets to see his son for 1 week before he leaves again. She thinks my mother is so better off as she was lucky to fly and visit us (for her 60th!) in March for 10 days. My mother’s both daughters live abroad so she constantly has her kids a 3 hour plane journey away.

    – His mother is needy and calls me cheeky if I don’t call her or text her (we have nothing in common)

    – MIL claims I am her daughter, I freak out. She wants me to learn how to cook her recipes so she does not have to cook anymore. She has a daughter herself. I am not interested in her recipes.

    – Sister in law started hating me after I failed to respond to a message prior to our wedding that she was excited that we were going to become sisters. I was very busy organisisng our move as well as the wedding and this text totally missed me. And frankly, I found such a message very shallow.

    I HATE MY IN-LAWS!!! I am scared to death my MIL will overtake this baby and expect weird stuff from me. I am a very independent person who hates when I am not given space. My husband also SUCKS at telling his mum off. I just want to feel I am the wife.

    #757104 Reply


    She’s going to expect weird stuff. Therapy.

    #757106 Reply


    You sound delightful…

    #757110 Reply


    Sounds like you married into the wrong family.
    Did you think about any of this stuff before you married him?

    In any case if this bothers you so much speak up. No point getting mad and expecting him to read your mind.

    #757130 Reply


    All I can say is to not be so adversarial with the in laws and sit down with your husband and CALMLY discuss your concerns without badmouthing his family of he’ll start keeping score and use it against you if you give him ammunition…do not give a man ammunition.

    To be honest he doesn’t sound like a “mama’s boy’, it sounds like he doesn’t see her as often as he did or used to and is trying to balance his family, new town, work, and a wife the best way he knows how.

    #757140 Reply


    Sounds like a Chinese family.

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