Home › Forums › Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals › My husband cropped my body out of our wedding photo
- This topic has 5 replies and was last updated 4 years, 5 months ago by
Lane.
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Sylvia
I just got married and we took a bunch of beautiful photos outdoors. I had a snug fitting beaded vintage gown on and I thought I looked great! I have curves and they were definitely accentuated but I’m in good shape and don’t really have any negative thoughts about my body.
Apparently my husband does.
He’s never said a negative word to me before. Yes, I’ve called him out on his shallow comments but they were never directed towards me. The first time he told his mother about me the first thing she asked was “is she petite?” Eye roll, I know. But never, ever had he poked at me about my weight or body.
These photos were gorgeous as they were. But before he sent one to his family, he cropped it all the way up to my waist. Essentially, cutting my entire body off. He tried to do it without me noticing too, which is why I’ve been hesitant to even bring it up to him. Mind you, this was the day after we got married. It hurt. And it still hurts. I started taking another look at myself and stopped before I realized I was going down a rabbit hole
I didn’t want to go down. This was a “him” issue. Not a “me” issue.And no, there was no other reason for him to crop me. I’ve thought about all options but none exist.
Should I even bother saying anything? Or just move on and be glad that he doesn’t outwardly tell me to change?
Better off single
You’re overthinking it. He married you so he obviously loves you the way you are.
Maybe he is being posessive and doesn’t want other family members admiring your beautiful body?
Pick your battles. You are happy with the way you look so it shouldn’t matter. Let this one go.
kaye
I think you are WAY overthinking this!! It could be dozens of reasons and none of which have to do with him not thinking you’re beautiful! As a matter of fact, He could have wanted the focus of the photo to be on your faces and that’s why he cropped them. Or as someone else pointed out he doesn’t want some of his family ogling your curves in the tight dress! If he had an issue with it I’m sure it would have come out on your wedding day. But it does remind me of my husband and how he changed once we got married. I too have a curvy figure but am in shape. Once we got married all the sudden some of my tops and cross wrap dresses became “not suitable for work” despite the fact I had worn them previously all the time!! And he’s made comments about me not wearing certain tops around some of his friends because they do ogle and stare at me. We’ve even been getting dressed to go somewhere and he’s asked me to change because he doesn’t want to have to endure an evening with guys staring at me! Now granted these are some of the same outfits I wore when we were dating and he didn’t say a word. Even liked them and thought I looked beautiful. But then all the sudden now that I’m his wife he doesn’t want me wearing them and OTHER guys looking at me! LOL And I’m not talking anything slit down to my navel or slip up to my thigh or super tight or short either. Things I would deem appropriate to go out in and I’m quite conservative. Plus I’m older so I’m not dressing like some 20 or 30 something going out to the clubs either! So what I’m saying is once you’re officially his wife it may be he’s a little more possessive and not wanting to show all your assets off to everyone! Don’t let this make you insecure at all!! He loves you just the way you are or he wouldn’t have married you. Be happy with that.
Anderson
I can handle criticism thrown at me. A lot of it even gives me a kick/laugh. But someone criticizing someone I love (even family member or bfriend) and it’s rarely a laughing matter. If it’s something they’re selfconscious then I get even more overprotective and stern.
My sis offered me a lot of support through my recent breakup which I’m so grateful for. But during our talks one time she said my ex wasn’t even good looking. I understand she was trying ti help, and even though I had no intentions to get back with the ex, I told my sis that was a nonsense thing to say because I thought she was madly good looking. Was a bit of an awkward moment but our conversation went on about other stuff.
In that light, him cropping you makes perfect sense. It’s so much easier to avoid that entire situation than open the can of worms by dealing with it.
Anderson
I’ve never been married and sometimes I feel I may be even a different planet so someone enlighten me. Why can’t you share a concern, even if silly, with a serious partner? I understand refraining with the person you’re dating but spouse? Confused.
Lane
Are you sure he wasn’t cropping himself? Maybe it was the way he viewed himself that made him do it? Just ask “curious as to why you cropped our photo’s? Then see how he responds…keep it short, direct, and simple.
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