This topic contains 5 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by LE Marked 4 clearance 9 months, 1 week ago.
May 16, 2019 at 2:42 pm #750212
I’m going to write the full story here to create the best picture possible.
My girlfriend broke up with me and I really need advice what to do.
It all started about 3 years ago. Before there was any kind of connection with my ex, and she even was dating someone else. I slept with her sister but this was a one off. There were no feelings or whatsoever involved.
Then after a few months my ex girlfriend became single, and I got to know that she had an intreset in me. Curious as I was I contacted her, and since then we never stopt talking to each other. We started a relationship, but she knew from the start what happened with her sister, she already knew before we even started talking to each other.
Our first year together was really nice, we had some ups and downs because she went to college and I’m kind of a jealous person, but we managed to keep it going and we still loved each other.
After about a year there was the first break up. She is an overthinker and kept thinking about the fact that I slept with her sister before having a relationship with her. She told me she wanted to break up and so we did. After 3 hours she contacted me again because she regretted it immediately and wanted to talk. We got back together.
The following months were really nice, but to be honest the intimacy faded. We still both wanted to sleep with each other, but for some reason it just didn’t happen.
She started having doubts, but still was happy.
This year in march (so just before we were together 2 for 2 years). She broke up with me a second time. She told me she wanted to be young and free, and needed to find out who she was. (She is 19 at this point and I’m 23). I could understand the fact that she wanted to discover herself and enjoy her young years, but never ever told her she couldn’t go out or go and have fun with friends so she could actually enjoy being young.
We got back together again after a week. She told me she was really happy and kept telling me she loved me. We still kept doing everything for each other and kept enjoying each others company.
Now 2 months later she broke up with me again because according to her the spark wasn’t there anymore. She told me the relationship had burned out on her side, but I can still feel she cares and all. It’s only been 4 days but she already contacted me to see if I was okay with her comming to an event where I would go.
I miss her and still love her, and a part of me still wants to get back together with her.
We went through so much together. She struggled with being happy and at some point almost tried cutting herself as an escape from her thoughts. I came home with her from a vacation because she wasn’t feeling happy and needed to set herself straight again.
Any thoughts??May 16, 2019 at 3:18 pm #750213
Get to the bottom line. Too longMay 17, 2019 at 4:01 am #750257
I think you’re both incredibly young and a break up is probably for the best. Time heals xMay 17, 2019 at 5:06 am #750259
sorry to be brutal, but honestly man she broke up with you 3 times and you still want her? why would you want someone who doesn’t want you? she is playing with you
leave and never look backMay 21, 2019 at 8:21 pm #750796
Not a good situation. She keeps breaking up with you for “whatever reason.” If you say you love her and If she’s cutting herself, get her help. Therapy sounds like a great start. That is not normal- did you tell her parents? She needs mental help. Be a friend to her. Put the relationship on the back burner and be her friend. She is too immature for a real relationship.May 21, 2019 at 9:18 pm #750807
LE Marked 4 clearance
She is an overthinker and kept thinking about the fact that I slept with her sister before having a relationship with her.
She battled wether or not it was the right thing to do because letting a man come between family can cause a lot of unnecessary drama. There are plenty of other men out there who haven’t slept with her sister, so why stick with you? She probably loves her sister more. “She told me she wanted to be young and free, and needed to find out who she was.”
In other words: I’m trying to be nice about this, “maybe there’s someone better out there than this dude who slept with my sister first.”
-Or- you kept bringing it up (in fights or when you were jealous) and she got fed up along with a ton of other mixed emotions. Which is why she kept coming back. Thinking maybe she over reacted because she did really want to be with you.
“she broke up with me again because according to her the spark wasn’t there anymore. She told me the relationship had burned out on her side”
–did you bring up the sister again? Were you jealous and possessive? How is her relationship with her sister?
If she’s an over thinker, has low self esteem, and a lack of confidence she probably feels like maybe you took the “I’ll just settle for less” because it didn’t work out with the sister.
Head-case and too much drama. You had to cut a vacation short because she was cutting herself. It must have been a miserable spot for her to be doing that. Vacations are supposed to be fun and help keep your mind off of things.
What’s going on in her life to make her want to do that because from what you wrote, I honestly don’t see a problem other than you trying to be supportive…unless you kept bringing up the whole sleeping with the sister thing when ever you felt upset or jealous.