Mixed signals while LDRing?


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    Alheli

    I’m on a 10-month LDR with a guy who lives 700 km away. We are both expats working as Government consultants for the same Department, and as such we are under a tight schedule that includes weekends. We can reasonably expect to see each other no more than once a month. We try to combine meetings/ assignments and spend a week together, but it is not always possible.

    He was promoted recently and his work load increased. He moved out of his sister’s house -where he lived since his divorce- and got his own place. He’s not used to live alone, which is obvs creating a disruption in his life habits. He’s also a perfectionist, so he’s doing renovations himself since no Contractor satisfies him. We’ve discussed moving together and he’s already trying to help me get a job transfer to his Office.

    Since his promotion and the move, he’s being less afectionate with me. He’s not emotionally distant: He’s attentive, he calls me frequently, he assist me on everything he can, but he always seem to be on his way to do something. I’ve discussed the matter with him and he says he loves me and it’s all in my head. Same way he acknowledges being busier than he’d wish and sometimes extremely tired.

    I don’t perceive there’s someone else since we call each other several times a day, and he’s always at reach, visible and accounted for. But I think that with so many changes in his life, I’m not a smuch a priority as I used to be. I’ve suggested we take a break to reflect on whether we are still a thing on his new scenario but he wouldn’t hear of it.

    When we are together, I laugh ay myself for even considering being without him because he’s the sweetest, kindest, most genuine and and smartest guy I know; and of course it doesn’t hurt there’s a strong atraction. But when ‘something’ happens as if the way he hastily says goodbye on the phone, or not using an enderamnt term where he used to, I get really sad and concerned.

    We are both 45, and I’d hate being wasting my time with him, I’d really love to hear your thoughts. Thanks.

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