Is he a narcissist? Controlling? Leave him?


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This topic contains 5 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Anne ohio 7 months ago.

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  • #732776 Reply

    Annie B

    Every since I have moved in with my boyfriend he has threatened to kick me out over the most benign things. I know I am not perfect but for some of the stuff he kicks me out for are just stupid. For example I jokingly said he was stupid and his music sucked. Now if he was inebriated beyond capacity he would see that I was being silly but he took it to the next level. In the past month he has threatened to kick me out and I guess the only way to say it is to keep me on edge and thin ice. The problem is I do love him but am I do see verbal and mental abuse. He denies it and says I’m lucky to be with him and if u don’t like it leave. I am currently kicked out because of what happened and he says he wants to stay together. Honestly I just need to know that this is not proper behavior and if if someone can give me tips on what to do from here on out. Should I break up with him? I don’t think it’s fair for me to be living on “thin ice” all the time. Especially when I treat him good other than the occasional argument.

    #732777 Reply

    OK

    Since you are already out, I would stay out. You already know the answer to your question. It doesn’t matter what you want to label his personality. This isn’t working for either of you. I would tell him that and remain moved out.

    People in love don’t disrespect each other and it seems you are both a toxic combination.

    What would compel you NOT to move on from this man? And please don’t say love. He isn’t in love with you or he wouldn’t treat you this way.

    #732791 Reply

    Annie B

    You are right. I think I am already into deep with the mental abuse. I was in a relationship years ago and for some reason I kept going back to the toxicity. I had low self esteem and no dignity. The guy was abusive and for some reason I kept going back. I’m going to get self help books and stay away. Easier said than done. Anyone else have any positive words to get me through this?

    #732801 Reply

    Heather

    You need to get some support IRL. Is there a group you can join at a church or community center to help you through this break-up? Because you should stay out. And let’s be honest, you weren’t joking when you said he was stupid and his music sucked. I’d never say that even as a joke to a man I cared about. It’s not funny.

    Come on, read what you wrote. He kicked you out over nothing but he wants to stay together? That’s just messed up. Stop falling for his crap. Stand up for yourself. Tell him it’s over and don’t look back. There are many better men.

    This is about you loving you enough to not be someone’s doormat or punching bag. This is going on because you allow it. When you revoke permission – which you can do this minute – and really mean it, your life will change.

    #732849 Reply

    Anne ohio

    You love the man he could be, and should be. You love his looks and you are sexually attracted. I understand.

    A narcissist has no empathy. Kicking you out is hurting you. He doesn’t care if you hurt.

    A narcissist strikes back with everything they’ve got at the slightest criticism. They are spiteful.

    Read up on narcissist.

    Try to force yourself to stay away.

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