This topic contains 13 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Better off single 3 weeks, 1 day ago.
September 19, 2019 at 5:55 pm #773597
A guy that I’ve been chatting with for a week has asked me about my favourite restaurants and hot spots, and I told gave him a general idea of a few restaurants at a location in my city.
He told me that he’s been to those restaurants in that location, adding that “we should go for food sometime 😊”
What does his comment mean? Is it considered asking me out for a date or something casual /friend zoning?
How should I reply to his message?
ThanksSeptember 19, 2019 at 6:15 pm #773598
Just say, sounds good. See if he bothers to ask you out.September 19, 2019 at 6:20 pm #773600
I agree with Kim.
He asked what you like let him follow up.September 19, 2019 at 9:06 pm #773613
Best to be bold and get to the point of meeting each other. Just say “Great. Set up the place day, and time and let’s get some food :o)” If he doesn’t follow up, blank him, and move on to someone who actually wants to meet you, not fade out when he gets bored ‘chatting’ with you.
Women today spend far too much time texting and dating their phones.September 19, 2019 at 9:46 pm #773615
Will do! 😊
Thank you ladies, Appreciate your help and advice.September 20, 2019 at 10:31 am #773651
Say okay with a smiley or wink face and wait for him to plan something…you don’t have to read into this too much. If he doesn’t initiate then move on to the next guy(s). It usually helps to talk to a few men so you don’t focus all your energy on one…:)September 20, 2019 at 12:42 pm #773660
There’s a multitude of answers you could give. All of the above, ‘great plan ! 😉’ etc
Whatever you choose, do it and then see what he brings to the tableSeptember 20, 2019 at 2:12 pm #773677
Firstly, you need to understand that he was asking you out. He is doing nothing wrong, but he essentially did. Not every person is direct or confident. If you live by such stringent rules and expectations dating becomes very difficult. Any suggestion that you should do something together should be considered an invitation. Maybe you do not pressure the details, but make it easy for him to win. That is all men want. Appreciation and easy to win.
“That sounds like fun! What were you thinking ;-)?”
BTW, easy to win does not mean by a pushover or leading. It means being clear in how he can win with you. When you lay that out, it makes it so easy for them and then you can be appreciative of what they are doing for you. My responce makes it clear that he is winning – you enjoy the idea and want him to put something together. BOOM. Done.September 24, 2019 at 10:56 pm #774002
Thanks everyone for your kind advice and helpful information.
I did as per suggested and we went out for a lunch date… BUT the entire time he talked about his ex-girlfriend and how, they constantly broke up and got back together.
He even asked me how I see him as a stranger and what I think about his looks and personality.. I responded very short and gave him my opinion in general.. I also, casually asked him if he plans on going back to his ex at some point again and he responded “not for now, as I’m trying to have a me time and upgrade myself.. But maybe in 2-3 months if we meet again at a mutual friends party.. I might give it another go.”
he also said that he is not looking for anything solid and wants to find friends now and get to know them for the time being.
After my date, I messaged him that night as a courtesy and thanked him for the good time/lunch and he responded the same way wishing me a good day with a few smiley faces.
Maybe I’m skeptical? Maybe I’m thinking too much over just a date.. But I feel like I should move on and not waste my time since he was talking about his ex non stop?? Or should I give him another chance and message him again??
K.September 24, 2019 at 11:13 pm #774003
I seriously hope your not kidding in that you want to meet him again?
You really need to get some ‘guydar’ and set the bar a lot higher! The answer is a big fat NO btw.September 25, 2019 at 2:18 am #774006
you can meet him casually as a friend when your at a loose end and just want to hang around with friends. but don’t get involved with him. you can keep in touch as casual friends.September 25, 2019 at 3:31 am #774015
Oh Honey, Move on!September 25, 2019 at 6:37 am #774019
In your original post you asked if this guy was friend zoning you. There is nothing more friend zoning than talking about your ex (and how you’d consider getting back together with her!) on the first date. Honestly I probably would have cut the date short and left, if it were me.
Forget this guy. Don’t message him. Don’t even waste your time being friends with him, in my opinion. Any guy that spends a first date talking endlessly about his ex has issues.September 25, 2019 at 11:27 am #774037
Better off single
If you continue, you are setting yourself up for heartache with an emotionally unavailable person.