He talked about other girls

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This topic contains 9 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Kate 9 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #760673 Reply


    Hi! So, I’m going out with this guy since May and we’ve agreed to be non-exclusive for the moment, but today when he texted me, he said something that made me feel sick and just really awful. His text today was a lot different than his usual texts, he was kind of agressive, almost mean and I understand that we’re not exclusive and I’m fine with that, but today when he talked about a fantasy that he has of having sex with a bunch of girls at the same time, me included, that made me feel really bad. I mean, I know he has every right to date other girls and I can go out with any guy I want, but we never talked about other people we were seeing to each other. I never mentioned because I think it’s a lack of consideration and it’s a disregard for the other person, also because he once got jealous over a friend of mine. But now, why would he say something like that?! Is it because he doesn’t care about how I feel, deliberately wants to make me feel horrible or what? It could be a joke or something, but either way I think it’s not. Should I say something or is that overreacting?

    #760677 Reply


    3 months is about the time men step up or walk away. It sounds to me like he’s decided you’re not the one and he’s seeing whether he can use you instead of just walking away. I wouldn’t even bother replying other than to say “goodbye”.

    #760685 Reply


    Since you 2 are non-exclusive he might be trying to see if you’re open to fulfill his fantasy.

    #760693 Reply


    I guess the difference between us was that I have a lot more consideration and respect for him than he has for me and that I wasn’t up until today totally against the idea of one day our fling turning into something more. But obviously he doesn’t care.

    #760702 Reply


    Omg you are awfully rude in all of your posts. How’s your love life? I’m guessing it sucks. Have a little consideration. And yes mine does too but doesn’t mean I have to be mean. Jane, it sounds like that guy is a D bag. He’s testing you and you’re probably too nice. Kick him to the curb…he wants his cake and eat it too and does not deserve you or anyone else. Do not give him one more ounce of your energy/time/sex….:) You’re too good for that! :) xoxx

    #760724 Reply

    Better off single

    eww gross. Tell him you wanna opt out of the orgy.

    #760728 Reply


    He has little to no respect for you, and if a man doesn’t respect you, he will not progress. To be honest, you’re most likely too nice, which is fine when you’re with a like-minded nice guy who respects that kind of niceness but he’s not one of them. I would drop him like a hot skillet, and stop getting involved with men like this as they can affect you’re self-esteem and worth—no man is ever worth giving that up for, especially a sex buddy.

    #760773 Reply


    Yes, that’s pretty horrible. I wouldn’t see such a nasty comment as simply lack of respect nor testing whether you would fill his fantasy, I think he was deliberately trying to make you feel bad for some reason. You didn’t give enough details to guess his reasons… some players find it annoying if you don’t display any jealousy (which you don’t seem to) and then try to press your buttons, but I don’t know if that’s the case here. Anyway, time to let this one go, nothing good will come out of this.

    #760781 Reply


    you have been dating each other casually and are in an non exclusive arrangement. him sharing this kind of fantasy shows that he doesn’t take you very seriously or isn’t upgrading you as the exclusive gf. he is looking at you as just a girl he fancies through whom he can fulfil his fantasies. you obviously don’t think in the same way. if this insults you and makes you feel yucky just cut him out. don’t waste any more time with him. he has already made it obvious he is not taking you seriously.

    #760916 Reply


    You deserve better , walk away

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