He chose £20 client over me

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This topic contains 23 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Sisi 3 months ago.

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  • #740344 Reply


    Last week I asked if he could give a lift.
    He said no problem.
    Today I asked him if he was coming over so we could spend the night together and in the morning he would give me the lift.
    He said he can’t because he made an appointment with a client in the morning . I feel so cheap and not priority at all. I want to dump him over this but I like him so much I can’t. I am going to see on Thursday but I feel like cancelling that too but I can’t it’s with other people too.
    What would you guys do in this situation.

    #740346 Reply


    What would I do? I’d get my own car, use a service like Uber, get a ride with a friend, or use public transportation.

    #740347 Reply


    Miss -A yes all that is available to me but that’s not the point.
    He agree to give me a lift, he cancelled on me for something so small. Wouldn’t you not question how much he values your relationship?

    #740349 Reply


    There are 3 things that you dont try to compete with – his mother, his kids, and his career…

    Now get over it and be happy

    #740351 Reply


    I don’t understand. He is not coming over at all now or just not giving you a lift in the morning? Where do you need a lift to and why can’t you get yourself to wherever you are going? You are leaving from your place, no? How would you normally get there? I’m not following

    #740352 Reply


    LALA he Empolyed and self employed too.

    Normally Tuesday evening and Wednesday during the day is is normally when we spend time together because we are both off.

    So last Wednesday I asked if when he comes over Tuesday if he can give me lift to my friend who I have not seen since September. Because she works the day I am off she works at school. School is close so she available on Wednesday to meet up she has children too.
    She normally comes to me so I thought this week I go and see her . She lives 45 mins away from me but near where he lives.

    So I thought it would work great if he just drops me to her since they live so near to each other and he was fine with it.

    But he suddenly booked himself up when he normally keeps Tuesday evening and Wednesday free for us.
    Now he is not going to see me this week at all on top of that.
    I will see him on Thursday but that’s just business so we won’t get alone time at all.

    #740354 Reply


    But to answer your question, no he is not coming over at all . Because apparently he was working all day and all day tomorrow too and he has very early start with one client hence the £20 client.

    #740357 Reply


    That’s his job….his livelihood and his passion (esp if he is self employeed). Do you understand how business works? Me thinks not. Today’s £20 client could become tomorrow’s £2000. His job will come before you… best get used to that

    #740361 Reply


    LALA thanks, I think im upset because I feel like he sending me a message that I shouldn’t reply on him.

    I don’t know, since we been seeing each other Tuesday and Wednesday has always been ours, and that’s over 8 months.
    And this is the first I have asked anything off him. It just feels like slap in the face.

    #740363 Reply


    I would be more concerned you have no weekends with him.

    #740364 Reply


    I work during the weekend and he does too.

    And we talk until one of us go to sleep so I don’t have issue with that at all.

    #740365 Reply


    So our weekend is Tuesday and Wednesday

    #740367 Reply


    If you’ve seen each other every Tuesday and Wednesday for eight months, and this is the first time it’s happened, then it’s a one off so let it go.

    I’m in the same situation, dating someone who works full time and is self employed. You need to understand that work will always come first until his biz is big enough to employ someone else.

    You’ve been fortunate it hasn’t impacted you yet, but it was inevitable that it finally would. When you’re building a business you don’t say No to any client, because the client will move on to the next person who says Yes and not look back.

    It doesn’t mean he’s not ever going to be there, and it doesn’t mean he’s losing interest. But this is important for him to do.

    I’m sure he feels badly but is hoping you’ll understand. And I’m sure he’ll be around next week again. Either drive yourself (or Uber it) to your friend’s house or postpone it a week.

    I know it stings at first, but you’re either going to have to accept this can – and will – happen, or find a guy who’s not as driven to succeed.

    #740376 Reply


    He chose his livelihood and career over a woman he sees only once a week for 8 months? Shameless!

    #740385 Reply



    #740392 Reply


    This is a $26.00 fight… Dump him!

    #740394 Reply


    Raven we have not had fight over it.
    But I do see him differently now, I think after tomorrow I’m going to just fade away, I think that is what he might want too.

    I think he might have changed his mind about me for whatever reason. And to be honest, I don’t care to have discussions over it when the outcome is going to be the same.

    #740406 Reply


    What would I do in this situation? I would: 1) find alternative transportation; 2) reschedule for another day; or 3) explain to your friend that your BF had an unexpected meeting with a client and if she could drive to you. This is a big part of being an ADULT—coming up with solutions when life throws a curveball because trust me this isn’t even a lob and will have far more difficult problems or issues facing you as you go along in life.

    Terry, you appear to very young and naive about men and life in general.

    A man isn’t here to just serve you! As an adult, you need to be independent and fully capable of getting yourself from A to B and not be overly reliant on another. His business is going to take precedence over a ‘date night’ based on the client’s schedule until he’s in a position where he can afford to hire others to take those appointments. He is trying to improve himself and you’re acting like a spoiled little princess to be honest.

    May I ask what you do for him? Its sounds like he does things for you, such as driving you around and spending majority his only two days off with you; so I’m asking what do you do for him other than gripe and complain when he’s trying build a business? If you can’t support him or solve problems like an adult when they arise, I think you should fade out so he can find a woman who’s supportive, independent (self sufficient) and doesn’t throw a hissy fit when things don’t go her way.

    #740407 Reply

    Devil’s Advocate

    You sound like one of those high maintenance women men get tired of after awhile. No one wants a demanding girlfriend who has no flexibility if plans have to change and something comes up. The man has come to you and spent every Tuesday night and Wednesday with you for 8 months and you want to dump him for changing plans one week??!? If he works everyday but Weds just when is he supposed to me his self-employed clients?

    Put on your big girl panties and find alternative transportation to your friend or ask her to come to you. I seriously doubt this is the first time you’ve ever asked anything of him.

    #740412 Reply


    Terry, it shouldn’t be a big deal really. If I were you, I’d rather have him come over and spend quality time together with me. And in the morning, I’d let him do his work while I’d find alternative transportation. You’re a big girl!

    You should understand that his world doesn’t revolve around you, and your world shouldn’t revolve around him either. You should both be independent while maintaining happy relationship. If you’re gonna dump him over this tiny small insignificant matter, then do it because apparently you’re not ready to compromise in relationship and it’s not fair for him. So please think again.

    #740442 Reply


    Well, my gut feeling was right, now he is totally ignoring me.
    Yesterday when he told me he couldn’t take me, I said that’s fine babe. He said nothing.

    Today I messaged him, he came on online when I was typing he totally read my messages and left.

    And that’s totally unlike him.

    So yeah yes ladies when you feel something is wrong, it normally is. I asked he how was, told him about my day.
    And nothing so yeah, it has nothing to do with me being high maintenance but him totally going off me.

    #740446 Reply


    If he’s feeling the vibe (negative energy) from you the way we are I would ignore you too!

    Trust me, he knows you’re ‘dissapointed’ but building a clientele is important too and if feels it’s going to be a competition …you v. Building a business; he will opt or the business because he’s looking at it as a long-term Enture and a man will drop a girlfriend if the relationship starts becoming too hard and unable to juggle both.

    #740447 Reply


    Darn phone… meant “ long term venture…”

    #740450 Reply


    He could just got busy… I would worry only if it is more than 24 hours that he does not reply

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