Guy I like may be related to me

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This topic contains 10 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Ginger bread 5 months ago.

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  • #760160 Reply


    So here is a tricky situation..

    I met this really wonderful guy. We were hitting it off from the second we spoke. He was calling and initiating on a regular. Until I found out that we have the same last name. I did a background check and asked the elders of my family if i may be related to his family and apparently we are not as they haven’t heard off his family. The thing is, I got my last name from my father’s stepfather.. meaning if my grandmother did not remarry I would have a different last name. But reality is we have the same last name and as much as we both feel the chemistry and want to be together, I told him I’m a bit weirded out about this. See, I want to get married in the future, he does too, so is it going to be weird to be married but still have your maiden name? Is it even legal to marry a person with the same last name? Religiously and all? Could the chemistry we feel may be a family bond we have and are unaware? Also what if he is related to my step grandfather’s side of the family? Neither him or I knows very much of our ancestors, not even our parents does, so we can’t be sure.But one thing we both know is that our last name is pretty rare from where we are from. Not many people has it. Which gives me the chills.

    I really like this guy, so much that I’ve kissed him already..a lot! So whether we are family or not this part is already too little too late. However, before I consider any next step I wanted another point of view on the matter.

    Would you date someone with the same last name as you? Is there a future? He told me he doesn’t believe we are blood related and he wants to pursue this with me, he’s calmer than me about the whole thing.

    #760163 Reply

    Wendy Hart

    There are dozens of people with the same last name, and who have been married to each other in spite of this. Believe it or not there are people who have the last name and are not related at all. If older members of your family aren’t familiar with his, I guess it’s safe. But if it will help, try getting a DNA test? Though I think it can only confirm direct parents and siblings, but you should be able to ask your local hospital for it. If you are related, it must be distant. I think the important thing here is that you love and respect each other.

    #760165 Reply


    Woah!! Slow down here! You are already talking marriage with a man who you just found out his last name!!! And you got your last name from your father’s STEPfather…meaning you aren’t related to that name by blood. So how exactly could you be related to him?

    #760167 Reply


    Question of the day:
    “Is it even legal to marry a person with the same last name? Religiously and all?”

    * shakes head *

    #760169 Reply


    This is new level of crazy obsession

    #760173 Reply


    You’re so well spoken it’s hard to believe you’re truly caught up worrying about this. But I can understand being a little spooked if your last names are rare. That will make anyone wonder. Get the DNA test like someone mentioned if it will really ease your worries.

    There’s no such thing as biologically sharing a chemistry with someone before even meeting them just because you’re related. You might be influenced by some TV episodes. Same last name is not a dealbreaker for me, and I’m sure many others. Pretty sure it’s legal too.

    #760175 Reply


    Why does everyone keep saying a DNA test? I feel like I’m in an episode of the Twilight zone where no one has an ounce of COMMON SENSE! Her grandmother remarried a man with this last name. He is NOT her father’s father. She clearly said if her grandmother had not remarried she would have a different last name. Therefore, her blood relations and family name are not this guy’s name!! He could be related to her step grandfather but not her. Geez!

    #760187 Reply


    Kaye that’s what I’m thinking. This makes no sense at all.

    #760193 Reply


    What’s the problem. Saves you money and time on a name change if you get married.

    #760366 Reply


    Well thank you all for the responses. I was hoping I wasn’t coming off as crazy!!! It’s just this hasn’t happened to anyone I know off. Got a little worried there. Doesn’t hurt to make sure you know. And I’m thinking marriage because I’m not dating for anything less and he knows that.

    It helps to have heard different views guys, thank you. It’s a good one this one, I won’t let a name scare me off.

    #760397 Reply

    Ginger bread

    I’d be weirded out too.

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