Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › First date text
- This topic has 5 replies and was last updated 2 years, 3 months ago by
Dexie.
-
AuthorPosts
-
Sal
I went on a date with a man on Sunday night. We got drinks at a local wine bar and it seemed like we had a great time. We laughed, talked, and our date lasted from 5 pm to 8 30 ish. When the bill came I politely took out my wallet but he offered to pay by saying “don’t worry I got it” and he thanked me for a great evening. We went outside where he was going to wait for an uber, and after a brief exchange I gave him a hug which he appeared to respond to (he didn’t seem to hate it or to turn into a statue or something). I walked to my car and on my way home he messaged me to see if I had gotten home, and we texted back and forth for a bit with me thanking him again for a nice evening and that I enjoyed meeting him. He responded with “same here” and telling me that he made it home. I told him I was glad he was home and to have a goodnight. Now it is Tuesday night and I have not heard from him. Is he not interested in seeing me again and was he just being polite by texting me after our date? I also will mention that we haven’t exchanged numbers, all of our messaging has been through the dating app. Ugh I’m so confused! Help!
Raven
Continue to date other guys…
There’s a ‘3 Day Rule’ – Some guys wait for 3 days until they message you again & set up another date…
He should have walked you to your car.
Liz Lemon
I had a really nce first date with my boyfriend, and it took him a few days to follow up and contact me afterwards. And it worked out fine. Sometimes it happens that way– guys might not want to appear too eager, or maybe they’re processing the first date and gauging their level of interest in you. It’s not uncommon. All you can do is wait and see if he gets it touch.
I will add, on the 1st date with my boyfriend, he asked me on a 2nd date (he asked if I’d like to do something specific, and I said yes, although we didn’t set an actual date/time right then, I figured he’d follow up if interested– and he did).
Just keep in mind, this was one date. It’s not the end of the world if he doesn’t get in touch. Hopefully he does, but if he doesn’t, you’ll be fine! As Raven said, date and talk to other guys, don’t put all your eggs in one basket at this point.
T from NY
Just as women are socialized to “be nice”, men also, generally, don’t want to do anything to upset or hurt a womens feelings. I say that not because I know what’s going to happen with this guy – but because women should not put much stock into what a man SAYS, or even DOES, in regards to knowing if a guy really likes them or feels a connection. They can DO and SAY all the right things, even ask you on a second date while on the first one.
All those actions and talk could be the man determining if YOU like him, his measurement of himself wondering if he impressed you ETC. The only true test of a man’s interest is what he does shortly after you go home. Once TIME has passed if he reaches out again within a couple of days, if he sets up consistent dates to truly spend time with you, how much effort he makes on your behalf, if he remembers what you say, if he makes you laugh, treats you respectfully ETC.
Be patient. Don’t lead. You’ve already shown interest, now it’s his turn. Men fall for a woman in their absence! Let him figure out he feels. And if he’s not the one – be thankful you had an interaction with a respectful one. You deserve that. Everyone does.
Eshika
I have had many different dating experiences in my life, out of which few men were really straightforward and stated that they just wanted a fling and not a long haul. But at times I also met guys who were very decent and showed interest in keeping a long term relationship. I personally feel that initially we should have some spark and a little eagerness to talk but you cannot judge anything in just 1 or 2 days. You need to give it sometime.
Dexie
Hey sal- sadly, I think he’s done with you. Whenever I’ve dated someone I could tell they were super into me because they just couldn’t leave me alone- def not for 3 days. They’d see me by initiating contact in person or dm me. This was legit daily.
My guess? Either you’ll never hear from him again OR he’ll zombie back in a few weeks months or years acting like nothing happened. This will be because it didn’t work out with any other girls he’s talking to but because he never broke it off with you he’ll think he still has a chance.
Don’t contact him! Then you’ll def show him all your cards.
Best of luck! Someone better for you, who is all about you and can’t get enough IS out there!-Dex
-
AuthorPosts
