This topic contains 12 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Maggie 1 week ago.
December 5, 2018 at 5:38 pm #731305
So I’m dating this new guy and noticed he is active on Facebook off and on all day long. He has close to 2000 friends and a lot of them are attractive females. I know it’s hard to say, but do you think he’s like most people and scrolling through or actively trolling for women?
Secondly, I’m not even sure if he’s that interested at this point. The last time we saw each other was awkward. He seemed stressed out and not that interested in me even though he assured me he was still interested. He then went on vacation. I texted him a question while he was gone and he didn’t respond. He just called me when he got back and apologized. He hasn’t been reaching out unless I reach out to him and didn’t even respond when I texted him good morning today. I think it’s pretty much done. Thoughts? Thanks for the help.December 5, 2018 at 5:49 pm #731306
Delusions of Granger
Sounds like he’s lost interest. He doesn’t dislike you. He just doesn’t like you enough to commit or make an effort.
Maybe he’s full of it and thinks the perfect woman is out there and he’s looking for her. Living for the fantasy chick.
Maybe he gets loads of attention and thinks he doesn’t need you because of all the attention he gets.
You’re better off single until a real man shows up. Not a teenager.December 5, 2018 at 5:52 pm #731307
Get off your phone, you and this guy’s whole world is a phone. Oh god, you people are putting the world in the toilet.December 5, 2018 at 7:56 pm #731316
not interestedDecember 5, 2018 at 10:44 pm #731340
Ok you have to live from your phone. Got it. lets work with your reality
If he doesn’t text you, then why do you text him? You can’t take a hint? In a texting world, it is a huge deal who texts last, why are you not paying attention to this?
Texting good morning?? he has 2000 friends to talk to, he has no time for good mornings. LOL
Do not text “good morning” to men. Especially if there is nothing else you want to say. In fact do not do it to anyone. What are you expecting from this GM? a continuous typing about nothing? in the morning? when everyone is in a rush to do something, coffee, driving somewhere? it is very silly do to that and would only get the opposite of what you want.
Make yourself scarce, be unavailable, busy, do not show him care, forget to reply, and you’d get more attention from this due. He is a sucker for attention, he has 2000 fb friends (!!), he is going to try and get you. The less you give, the more he’d want.December 6, 2018 at 6:44 am #731350
Sorry but the days when women could act aloof, all Miss High and Mighty are fast going the way of gas lamps and handsom carriages. Men now require from women a definite sign of interest or they’ll move on.
I know that women have a mental block about this but Men today are much more wary and suspicious about women thanks to #metoo,divorce r**e and the wide dissemination of red pill teachings. Men pre-internet had no way of contacting each other and comparing notes. Men today have a much better understanding of female nature. W
P.S. The fall out from #metoo is being seen on men’s websites. Me are strongly advising each other never to meet with a female colleague alone,and when this is not possible to always leave the office door wide range open. Men are also being advised on business trips to either stay at a separate hotel or if this isn’t possible to book a room in a different floor and under no circumstances to go a female colleague’s room. There is a joke going about that while the above will go some way to prevent men from sexual assault charges it will just open them up to sex discrimination charges. Many things have what are called ‘unintended consequences’. Many women thought that #metoo would clear out office predators and tame the office Don Juan,while not affecting male mentoring of female colleagues in the slightest. However as women are seeing men are not objects to be manipulated by women at will. Men have agency,and they have and will continue to take steps to protect themselves from career destruction.December 6, 2018 at 8:48 am #731352
“Make yourself scarce, be unavailable, busy, do not show him care, forget to reply, and you’d get more attention from this due. ”
Honestly, this isn’t going to work. Guys are too lazy to hunt these days. It’s also not going to work to keep reaching out. He’s basically kid in a candy shop until he decides he wants something real.
Stephen is pretty much spot on- men really don’t pursue anymore, because women have made sex easy. Online attention? That instagram friend is happy to post a pic of her butt. In real life? He probably has 9 or 10 FWB who will jump on his text. Men really don’t pursue for sex unless they are desperate. But the only thing pursuing them gets you is a spot in that FWB rotation.
Men who want a relationship will pursue, but some need a small amount of nudging at first, because a lot are aware of metoo. But this guy is not interested in a relationship. You nudged plenty. Move on. Also, there aren’t a very large pool of men seeking relationships. I noticed its guys starting families or men who *need* something. I mean, it’s cool, you can ignore guys, but when he has 2000 FB friends, half of which are women, he isn’t going to notice.December 6, 2018 at 3:38 pm #731410
Oh he WILL notice! Men’s ego will notice if a woman is giving him a cold shoulder. You have not done it yourself anon, have you? I speak from experience.
He might not be pursuing hard, but he WILL initiate again, to get your attention. A dude with 2000 friends is a sucker for attention.
And why do you assume that all women are rushing into FWB and happy to get whatever? it is still not the case thank God. Most pretty girls are PICKY. Thanks to the “you are worth it” advertising campaign..
Young good looking girls with decent jobs are a hot commodity still and they go after guys who are like them or better and demand proper courtship. We don’t hear from those girls because they don’t need as much advice on how to get a partner LOL they have enough options to chose from.
Sex is easy yes but not with very good looking young girls, LOL
And for average looking girls, still, the higher she thinks of herself, the higher she holds her nose up, the better her chances are of finding a good quality guy. LOLDecember 6, 2018 at 3:54 pm #731413
So your on Facebook doing detective to figure out if this man is still interested.
He hasn’t asked you out on another date, doesn’t reach out to you anymore,and isn’t responsive.
I think its safe to say he is no longer interested.December 6, 2018 at 4:05 pm #731416
“Men’s ego will notice if a woman is giving him a cold shoulder. You have not done it yourself anon, have you? I speak from experience.”
How old are you? And have you dated f-boys with throngs of insta and fb girlfriends? Giving them the cold shoulder isn’t going to make them buck up and pursue a relationship. They might text a little or like some pics, but uh…. All these guys want is attention.
I’m older, I have no trouble getting dates; I do know a lot of pretty, 20 something women with good jobs who deal with these players who do everything but go on dates. There is no way to win if they fit that profile.December 7, 2018 at 8:28 am #731481
Thanks for everyone’s input.
Either way, I’m going to stop contacting him. Either he’ll come back and maybe we’ll start talking again or that’ll be it. Regardless, it won’t entail any additional effort on my end. lol Will let you know how it goes!December 7, 2018 at 9:30 am #731485
In my experience, early on, men who are genuinely interested in dating you/pursuing a relationship don’t let communication slip without warning. They end dates with a new date or at least they communicate soon after the date to plan another date, or if they are super busy, they set that expectation. They don’t make you have to ignore them to get their attention. Within that first month or two, if you are questioning, it’s not happening.
There are a *lot* of men who do get interested in women as an ego stroke. If you get a guy who after a first date, he’s aloof, and if you ignore him, he comes roaring back, that’s a guy that’s playing a game to get his ego stroked. He might go out again or show you attention, but again, it’s about satisfying his ego. I think this happens a lot to attractive women- I notice it when its guys that I didn’t *really* connect with, but nonetheless found me attractive. They just want to know that the pretty woman likes them. You can game this all you like, my old neighbor did. She ended up with a bunch of emotionally unavailable guys pursuing her for dead end relationships. She did get a ton of attention. I do it too sometimes, a guy is attractive, I know its not right, but it makes me feel good to have him pursue me.
Genuine connections don’t require games to grow or sustain them. They do require space at times, and they don’t come about when either party chases with desperation.December 7, 2018 at 10:58 am #731492
Stephen, why are you even here? You have nothing to contribute other than hatred for women and bitterness.