Bf doesn't want to spend time.

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This topic contains 8 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Liz 5 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #735845 Reply


    We have been together a little over a year now and we really don’t get to spend time with each other. I live an hour and a half away from him. I saw him on New Years and he enjoyed ourselves. I drove to him and had no issue with it. I have been going through some family problems and just wanted to spend time with him even after I saw him on New years. Everytime I say I want to spend time with him he replies “dang I just seen you on New Years geez” like wth I never knew I would get rejected so hard by my own bf to spend time with him. But here is the kicker he has no problem telling me his family issues and I am always there to listen to him vent. He has no problem needing money from me. But all I wanted back was some time with him and when I ask for it I get that same exact response. My birthday is coming up on the 21st and I will not request to spend it with him because I have been rejected so much. I tried talking to him about it and he just tried to turn it around on me and make it seem like I am the one trippin. Like it really hurts I mean I do my beat for this guy I am loyal, I am always there for him when no one else is, I am a good gf. I get needing space but I was just wanting to be in his presence through a difficult time. Why not be there for me like I am for him. Quick to need sone money but can’t spend time with me unless it’s on his watch. Makes it seem like in a bad person to be around. When around each other it’s a blast we food around and do nothing but joke and laugh. I have a feeling I’ll be alone on my birthday on the 21st because I can’t bring myself to “beg” to spend time with my man. He is not working or anything and I still help out until he finds work. He barely calls unless he needs something and when I call it’s rare he answers he just texts. Do I just lay off the calls and texts and all for these next few days? Need hell because rejection like this hurts I will never do him this way.

    #735846 Reply


    He sounds like a loser. You could do better. Leave him and take your money back.

    #735850 Reply


    First thing: Stop giving him money- Geex!

    Second thing: He’s not a BF!

    Third thing: Move on already…
    – What are your ages?

    #735851 Reply


    Amber, if he doesn’t want your time but he wants your money, you’re being used. He might be ‘a nice guy’ but he’s not treating you nicely. If you’ve reached out to him in a time of need and been rejected, you are not a prioirity. I’m horrified at that to be honest, my FWB made himself more present when I told him I was having a rubbish time. Guys are fixers – let me come fix you.

    You need to end it, use the next week to plan yourself something fun / interesting for your birthday rather than thinking about him – I got a last minute flight and spent mine taking photographs of a volcanic landscape, and start talking to other men so you can see that there are people out there who would love to spend time with you.

    #735854 Reply


    Dump the guy and stop letting him take advantage of you and mistreat you. He doesn’t respect you! Find a guy close by who would treat you better.

    #735855 Reply

    Amy S

    OMG are you serious ? Tally up what he owes you and give him the bill and leave his sorry a s. This guy is playing you for an absolute fool.

    #735862 Reply


    I second all of the above-plus a “90 min drive and you can hardly ever get together”? My guy and I have seen each other every weekend for almost 2 years( I am moving to him in a few weeks) and we have that 90 min distance -with him driving here 90% of the time. This guy is not your bf-he is a loser and user. Break it off.

    #735863 Reply


    He is using you! Plain and simple, it is obvious to everyone and it is obvious to you. My question is why do you continue? What keeps you? You afraid you won’t find anyone better? Honey any warm body would be better than this.

    This is going to cost you a lot of sadness, bad mood, baggage, loss of self esteem. Why bring all this onto yourself?

    Give yourself a present on your BD and dump this loser!!

    #736096 Reply


    Do that to him! He is taking you for granted. You make it waaayy too easy for him to use you. I was in the same thing. For a year. I even would BEG him to see me. What girl needs to beg a guy for anything?? Well a girl that really loves a man who is selfish. To be honest, he could have someone else, he could be leading you on, OR he could just be an immature idiot. NO MATTER WHAT, you have to cut him off. Give him the chance to miss you. Give it 30 days of nothing! No matter what, you can’t break it. Yes it will kill you. But you will get your answer. It will either leave him shaking in his boots “where is she? Why isn’t she answering? IS she with someone else? Has she lost her feelings for me? What is up???” (it will force him to think about you!)- or you won’t hear from him- which is the answer you don’t want, but better know now as he would have left you no matter what. At least you
    Remember- it takes guys a few weeks to notice you are not around. DO NOT break no contact. Get your power back. Don’t beg him, or cry. It will just make it worse. I promise you this will work. He will chase you- and if he doesn’t, you will move on & be stronger for the next guy who is meant to be in your life!

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