Asked me on a second date but does not text


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This topic contains 28 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Sensy 1 month ago.

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  • #769633 Reply

    Lane

    In this situation, essentially NSA (No Strings Attached) sex you need to have very little to no expectations in regard to communication or time spent with this man.

    The problem here is you aren’t even ‘friends’ as you barely even meet the acquaintance threshold being that you’ve only spent one night together. The only thing the two of you agreed on was that neither of you were looking for anything ‘serious.’ He is essentially establishing his rules with you of what that means to him, one of which includes not texting very you much, and will primarily be for the purpose of setting up a day and time to have some sex.

    Just know he is communicating (texting), and meeting other woman, so that’s where his texting energy will be. He may not even be interested in getting to know you beyond the NSA (sex only), where you don’t even make it to the basic friendship level (FWB), as its really up to each individual to define what ‘not serious’ means for them, and will act accordingly.

    #769634 Reply

    anon

    Hey, I do the same thing with casual hook ups.

    It is not normal for a hook up to text you for 2 hours a day. He was excited to get laid, made his effort, got what he needed and now he is just maintaining communication. No one really wants to text 2 hours a day unless it is your soulmate.

    For your own sanity, if you are about that hook up life, I HIGHLY recommend that you have a couple guys in your phone that you get together with, (or at least continue dating). This guy is not committed to you- you are just on his roster now, and he is onto the next or revisiting a past woman. So you need to be onto your next or revisiting the past. Otherwise, you will care too much and be too much for this guy.

    #769723 Reply

    ANM Staff
    Keymaster

    Karen said:

    Another woman who puts more faith in texting and sex than into what a real relationship involves.

    Karen, you are sometimes pretty blunt. Some people think that also means you’re rude. There’s a big fuzzy line between “blunt” and “rude” so I don’t get worked up over it, and I usually let the OP be the judge.

    But when you start lamenting with lines like “You’re just another woman…”, you have to question why you’re choosing to post it at all. Even if you’re “telling it like it is”, you should question whether you’re saying something because it is going to help the OP feel better or YOU feel better.

    It’s a problem when lamenting about a person’s behavior becomes indistinguishable from an insult. Given the unique brand of stories we see around here, I know it can be hard not to cross the line and just say “y’all’s crazy”. But we all have an opportunity to think carefully before pressing the tiny grey submit button. There’s always the chance to double-check what’s been written and decide whether you’re writing it to help the community or writing it because it’s super important to you to spit venom.

    Even when you think the person is being incredibly naive, or contradictory, or silly, or ignorant, we try to do right by them in our responses. If a poster’s breaks your incredulity meter, then let it go! If it takes too much effort to squeegee the vinegar off your composition, then let it go!

    To the OP: Good luck.

    To everyone else: Apologies for the derail; let’s stay on topic; don’t dogpile here; semicolons are not solutions for run-on sentences.

    #769761 Reply

    Sensy

    What do you “really” want for yourself?

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