A kiss and then lack lustre texting… is he just trying to get me into bed?

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This topic contains 2 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Sophia 8 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #773775 Reply


    I met a guy we are both early 40s through a work event out of state. We both live in different states to the one we met in. Anyway we hit it off really well and ended the event that went over 4 days by kissing. One of the best kisses I’ve had to be honest.

    The first week I was still excited by him but I knew it was impossible but you know when you meet someone you like you think about them often. By week two the kiss had faded and I was back to normal again.

    So anyway he keeps texting me. So I’m thinking he he is keeping me warm until our next event. We are in the same industry so there is also questions as to how things went etc. but he isn’t looking for a banter style of texting because when I do try and engage him with questions with my return text he will not reply. So this guy sends me a text every week or so with questions about work and my next event etc and when I reply a short time later usually 2o min or less there is usually no reply…

    He has called me a few times… but I’ve missed the calls due to driving etc and when I try and call back he isn’t available.

    Anyway the next time I get one of these texts I don’t really feel like answering it . My feeling is that he is keeping connected to me so we can take kissing further at our next event in nov. I won’t be taking anything further or even kissing him again. We have mutual work associates and I want to keep things pleasant.

    I’m not sure how to handle this. I suggested he do this next event, and it was because it would have been good to see him but I’ve realised that he is not really interested in getting to know me even in a friendship kind of way. So now he is going and so am I. What should I do here? Stop replying to his texts, which are friendly not sexual. Or keep returning the messages as I would any friend and turn down any advances at the event.

    He seems like a nice guy and we have a lot in common and he would have made a good friend or boyfriend but not in another state. Not without some effort anyway. I feel like if he wanted to see me he could have arranged something.

    Oh, we met back on June.

    Thoughts ?

    #773776 Reply

    Better off single

    Yeah he may be just after sex.

    You both have busy lives and travel a lot so why not just go into it with the expectation that it wont go anywhere, so just be light hearted and fun? The minute you actually see him again, your thoughts on not kissing him again or even taking it further could possibly change anyway. As long as you don’t burn a bridge with him. Keep it in your head that in the long term, it won’t work out that way you don’t fall for his charm.

    keep returning the messages as you would any friend and turn down any advances at the event is probably the way to go.

    #773777 Reply


    I think he is just contacting you on a work basis.

    Answer his work texts with a work answer, or don’t bother, as it sounds like he doesn’t answer your questions.

    I don’t think there’s anything going on here besides networking.

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