Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › 3 Dates and Could he be losing Interest?
- This topic has 7 replies and was last updated 4 years, 4 months ago by
Holly.
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sidekickofbatman
So I have been on three dates with Mister X. On our third date everything was going well. Things got hot and steamy but there was no clothing coming off. He pretty much told me how he finds me attractive and intelligent and our time together is always fun and upbeat. However he has been shabby on his texting since our third date. I texted him this morning saying “Happy Thanksgiving” but I haven’t gotten a response back. He doesn’t seem to text first but when I text him, he usually carries the conversation pretty well. Is he no longer interested or am I just freaking out?
Tallspicy
New rule for you: “I never text men first until they are my boyfriend or arranged 4 dates with total consistency”.
From what you said, he might never have been interested. We will never know because you keep initiating. Please learn to mirror in dating – Evan mark Katz has a lot on the topic and it shadows what is on this sight.
Tallspicy
Btw, you did nothing wrong per se, it just that what men say means nothing. You should not emotionally invest until you are exclusive with someone…
K
One common cause of trouble that gets women posting here is they put too much stock in what a man says and not what he does. They give way too much trust and benefit of the doubt to a ma they hardly know and they get too far ahead of him.
When words and actions don’t match, the truth is in the actions.
Three dates isn’t much. He’s not yours to lose yet. Back way off and see what he does but don’t be surprised if this is the slow fade. Don’t get invested before.a guy clearly shows you that he is invested over a period of time. Personally I don’t even start taking a guy seriously until the six month mark.
Anderson
“New rule for you: I never text men first until they are my boyfriend or arranged 4 dates with total consistency”
Lmao. Reminds me of a quote “And when you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you”
LJ
Keep in mind that Thanksgiving (and the days surrounding) can cause a person to have an unusual schedule and can pull their attention in different directions, even unexpectedly. Even if he’s already stated at some point that he has no plans for Thanksgiving, he might get an unexpected call from family or an acquaintance that holds his attention for a while.
But also, there’s no useful information to be gained from texting. Want answers? Pick up the phone and call.
Steph
Do not initiate texting any more. A man who is genuinely interested will message you, even sometimes double message you if he hasn’t heard from you for a bit. Hold off on texting him and you will see what his true intentions are. It already sounds like you have doubts in his interest, which means you might be correct
Holly
I would cut him some slack since it’s a holiday and he might have a lot going on. However, the only way to get the answer you’re looking for is to not text him again. If he’s interested, he’ll text you back. If he’s not, he won’t. But you threw the ball into his court, so now it’s important for you to wait for him to throw it back to you before you make another move.
Also, I agree with the other posters who advised you not to place much stock in what men say. It’s true, unfortunately. Most guys, especially in the early stages, will say just about *anything* if they think it will win you over or get them into your pants, even if they aren’t all that interested. It’s a game for them. I would suggest finding several ways to distract yourself, including spending time with other guys you might be interested in, while you wait for this guy to make a move or not. Good luck!
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