In my article on why guys suddenly lose interest, I discussed how caring too much or stressing over your relationship can irreparably damage it. The article sparked an avalanche of e-mails and comments from women who were feeling panicked over the state of their relationship. Most understood the point I was making in the article, but rather than relaxing and just going with the flow, they wanted to know: “How can I fix it if I was stressing too much?” “What should I text him to fix the situation?” “Is it OK if I tell him XYZ?” “Is he gone forever?” “How can I get him back?” OK, full stop. This is exactly the problem Eric and I have been addressing at length, not only on the site, but also in the newsletter and on our Facebook accounts.
But I realized that identifying the problem is only half the battle. The next step is to get to the root of it and figure out how to solve it.
When you eliminate the care (or worry or stress or whatever you want to call it), you are free to really be in the relationship. You can see the other person for who he is and you can give yourself to him freely – no strategy, no game-playing, no manipulation. You won’t feel a need to control anything. You can just be and there is no greater feeling than that.
But how do we do it? How do we stop our minds from spinning into overdrive, sending out waves of unpleasant thoughts and alarm bells?
Read on to find out!