This topic contains 5 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Algo 3 months ago.
October 22, 2017 at 8:37 pm #661799
Ladies, I ask you…
Why Is It So Difficult To Say No?
A lot of your problems here could be solved with a simple no.October 22, 2017 at 8:51 pm #661800
I can’t speak for everyone. But for myself, I have plenty of reasons – not healthy reasons – but reasons nonetheless. I’ve been severely bullied throughout my childhood adolescent and even into my 20s about my appearance and personality – being told by my own family how I will never find a partner – toss in mental health issues including depression, BPD and PTSD – so the idea of ever being desired by anyone appears improbable. When it does happen i do feel rather elated – and begin acting rather emotionally, honestly thinking about the improbability of it ever happening again. I know I’m not at all in a healty space to be in a relationship atm, by the idea of being desired is just so appealing and definitely hits my insecurities.October 22, 2017 at 8:54 pm #661801
You are so right. I have been posting about a recent NSA encounter that has had a negative impact. I always feel l have to explain myself and find it really hard just to say a simple NO.October 22, 2017 at 9:17 pm #661803
OK. I understand you young ladies have issues….that is where you have to practice with your friends or in a mirror.
Say no two hundred times….and if that does not do it keep saying it until it becomes natural.
Learn to say no.October 22, 2017 at 9:28 pm #661804
Eventually we will learn to. I did. I recently had to say no to a guy who is so kind, well educated and a gentelman. But he doesn’t have time for me even though he kept telling me he will make time. I had to end it. But in the past, it was hard to say no and let go. Our personal issues will always get in the way so it is important that we keep on working on improving ourselves. I realized over this course of dating since I became single how important it is to be happy on your own first and living a full file.October 23, 2017 at 12:59 am #661837
Both my parents have problems saying what they actually want so I grew up with it.
I’m learning to ve more selective with the friends I I’ve studied time and effort in and luckily my bf is trying really hard to get me to be more assertive and decisive as well.
But yeah, I didn’t grow up with people being able to voice their wants and needs properly. But I’m learning.