What am I even doing here….?!

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    Almost 6 weeks ago, at my ten year college homecoming, I got a little tipsy and ended up kissing a boy I never knew in school (also my year). We had a great time together and I ended up sleeping at his hotel (but we didn’t sleep together like that!) and before I was even out of his bed he was asking me to come visit him (I live in NYC and he lives in DC). I thought he was attractive and very sweet but not super intimidating and felt comfortable with him. He texted me every day and I visited him for a night three weeks later (which I extended into two nights), and in that period he took me to a going away party for a friend and brunch with his best friend and a hockey game with a work colleague.

    He asked ne twice that weekend if we could be exclusive, as he knows himself and especially when we start sleeping together, he can get jealous. I said I didnt want to and we should just continue to hang out when we can and continue to talk to each other and get to know each other as in the scheme of things we hadnt spent a lot of time together (although it did feel pretty intimate staying with him, playing house like that).

    It’s been three weeks now and we still talk every day (mostly by text but he really likes to talk on the phone – he often tries to arrange time for us to have phone time), but I am sort of wondering what the hell I am doing…. We don’t havw a hard date set to see each other again due to holiday schedules (the one weekend I weakly suggested he has a wedding), and I worry maybe I’m texting him too much now even though he was chasing after me so hard in the beginning… I’m nervous now that’s all over? I also find myself getting bouts of paranoia like is he sleeping with another girl right now when 1. we’re both allowed to! 2. i have always been the prize in this situation and 3. i know in any form of LDR these emotions would only get worse and i am prone to have these in a relationship after the first couple months.

    what am i even doing?! or more importantly… what should i do? he’s a great sweet guy so if i all of a sudden stopped talking to him i feel like that wouldnt make any sense. ive tried to sort of address this woth
    him twice and he was so carong and sweet about it but nothing really came of it. ugh.

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