Home › Forums › Decoding His Signals / How Does He Feel About Me? › We matched on Tinder again
- This topic has 14 replies and was last updated 5 years, 10 months ago by
Phillygirl.
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Anonn
So I met this guy back in February on Tinder. We had a casual relationship for four months. Never having sex or even kissed him but we did do oral. Outside of being intimate we had a great connection of communication and talking frequently almost everyday or every other day. From the beginning, I knew he was a private person but the more time we spent together the more the wall was coming down and we were really getting to know each other. However at the end of may he said he needed time for himself to sort out some issues in his life. I understood but the longer we went without talking, the more I would text and try to get in contact with him. Finally, he ended up blocking me through all of our communication. I was hurt and truly sorry for pushing him away. I’ve met up with him once since then for a short conversation and then it’s been a month of silence. Well since then I’ve been back on Tinder. I’ve gone on dates with two new guys. No sparks or anything but I thought in order to get over him, I should try dating new people. When I was looking at profiles one day, his came up. In my head I swiped right, thinking that someone who said they were truly done with me would not swipe right either, but to my surprise it was an automatic match. I was confused yet slightly excited that this was another chance. So I waited some time to send a message to him. It was simple and just stated that I was surprised that we matched and how have things been for him. He never responded to me but he had been active on the app. Then 6 days after, he unmatched me. What’s his deal? Is he just playing a game with me or was he contemplating talking to me again but backed out? I’m just confused about the whole thing as someone who would take such drastic measures to not talk to me, would match with me, having to know I’m going to ask how he’s been. I just don’t get it. Any advice?
alia
He is over it. He maybe swiped by accident or he had a moment of weakness. Then you messaged him and all the memories of being pestered came back to him, so he unmatched you.
Tinder may not be the right thing for you not dating in general at the current time. Consider doing some personal growth, check out books and workbooks on self esteem, self love. Make a conscious effort and spend a 1000 hours consistently working on loving yourself .Newbie
Oh girl, i forgot under what name you posted before, but we all told you to move on with good reasons. Please stop and find better use for your time. Its really not that hard to get a guy out of your head. You will be fine
JR
He’s not interested, he’s not playing games period. He wants the message loud and clear. You go too needy and desperate. You only had a casual relationship, nothing serious and he told you he needed space and you continued to reach out to him.
When men are interested they do 100% of the pursuing.
Khadija
Ohh please move on.
His silence speaks for itself, he is not interested.
Continue to date others and learn to respect space and boundaries.
If, you can’t take the lesson from this you’ll be doomed to repeat it.JJ
Message loud and clear
He has taken every possible step to block you. This means he is not interested.
Anonn
I believe he is playing games though. I reset my account because of running out of people in the area and his profile came up again. Out of curiosity I swiped right thinking it wouldn’t be a match again because of him unmatching me the last time, but we still matched for a second time! I can see where maybe the first time we matched was an accident but to swipe on me twice makes me think that he knows what he is doing or is up to something. I haven’t sent a message and I’m waiting it out to see if he will.
Sarah
If you match once you may match again. Happens all the time, it’s a tinder glitch. So he possibly never matched you a second time. Sorry to say this.
Anyway, who cares if he did match you or whatever? He made his intentions clear, you obviously freaked him out the first time round.
Sin
Some people are distracted when they are on tinder and some guys have the habit of swiping right for most girls listed. Either way how does it matter? He would be playing games if he called you up one day saying he misses you and then disappeared for a few days but in this case he has given you the message loud and clear that he does not want to be in touch with you. It’s okay but you have to move on leave him alone.
Gemini615
For the love of Christ will you PLEASE move on from this guy?! You’ve already posted about him before and you were given good advice by the ladies. Now here you are again with the Tinder bs.
Look, it’s really simple. If he liked you enough he’d pick up the phone and ask to take you out. Swiping right on Tinder is about the laziest thing I ever heard in my life in terms of showing interest. He’s not into you. Move on.
John
To second Max — the fact you apparently performed oral on this guy, and he refused to even kiss you, is a sign there was never any real relationship there. He was, sadly, simply using you.
If a guy likes you, and is worth of your interest, he will pursue *you*. He will kiss you. He will take you out and buy you dinner. He won’t just chat with you and accept oral from you.
Best case scenario, he has bizarre intimacy issues which prevent him from even kissing a woman. But even if that’s the case, you have to respect his stated wishes, and leave him alone. Nothing more unattractive than a stalker.
(The Tinder thing could be a glitch, or he could be swiping right on everyone simply to maximize his matches. Some guys do this.)
Even if he’s playing with you, why would you want to be played like that at this point?
In the future, set higher standard for yourself. Don’t blow someone unless they’re treating you well, and willing to reciprocate. Don’t pursue guys, make them come after you.
If you allow yourself to be treated poorly, guys will lose interest quickly, even if they have some to begin with.
Emma
Who cares? You’re wasting your own time asking why. We don’t know. Let it go.
Sandy
The app may have mistakenly matched you guys again because you guys matched before. It’s not the best app, it does make mistakes. Forget him, he doesn’t care. You’ve waited 6 days! It’s obvious he doesn’t care. Get on with your life and keep dating, you’ll find someone with sparks again. BLOCK THAT GUY SO YOU WILL NOT THINK OF HIM AGAIN! He’s not worth it!
claire
wait, you never kissed him but did oral?
two words for you: SELF RESPECT.
grow up and don’t put a d in your mouth if you haven’t even kissed. so gross. no standards for yourself.
Phillygirl
Why are we dredging up 2-3 year old dead posts?
PS: oral IS sex. SMH…
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