"voluptuous" – is he politely calling me fat?

Okay-I can’t take it anymore-Ruby you obviously want to say and think he called you fat-okay,go with that. It is like you will be satisfied with nothing less-in fact why stop with this forum-call the New York Times-this could be Bigger-pardon the pun-than the swearing in of the president! I wonder where L is when we need her?-lol.

I absolutely hate being called that so I understand where you’re coming from. Every time someone has said it to me, it was a compliment. If it’s helps, I got called that and I’m a size 2, but have curves. So not fat. But he’s attracted to you.

Being voluptuous is a fantastic thing to be! Take it as a compliment! And why would you date someone who has you immediately going to thinking he put you down?

Own your body! Be confident in what you have going for you and just assume that if someone doesn’t come out and say something mean, what they do say is a compliment.

Georgia I couldn’t agree with you more. We sometimes do obsess over the parts of our body that make us feel insecure. Thinking back everyone who has ever called me voluptuous, curvy, bubble butt or whatever else they say has always been someone who I dated and physically that is what attracted them to me.

Well, that’s not my problem. I have never posted here before. Just because this post may follow some pattern, you shouldn’t assume they’re connected

I think this person has a selfsteem problem and is just posting here so we tell her “you are not fat, you have big boons, etc…” don’t you have a grandmother? Or friends?
Seriously, even if you were fat, your boyfriend may like fat people, many guys do. Just do with your body what you want and don’t worry about what others think.

Stop being annoying. Are you the same person that complained about the flowers?

Jeez…

Ruby if you had already decided your boyfriend was a douche bag and insulted you-why the hell did you need the opinions of people you were not going to listen to anyway? You sound like a piece-(fat or not, who knows or cares)-of work. Many people have found the feedback here to be useful and helpful. I am sorry you did not. Not that you have to listen or take advice -but you actually insulted those that honestly tried to help-not the other way around-us insulting you. You could have gracefully said thanks or no thanks-you are as much of a jerk really as you claim the opinion givers are.

No one has actually given advice, except for a couple people. All I’ve heard is “you’re insecure”repeatedly.Well,who isn’t from time to time. Doesn’t mean I live my life being insecure. If this is how you guys treat everyone that comes here seeking another perspective, I don’t see how anyone could find this helpful. I doubt most of you even want to help, you just want to sit back & pass judgement to make you feel better about your own lives

Another waste of time. Is this meemee? One of the other scorned? Because now it’s just a repeat of the same crap with an OP who ends up bashing everyone.

Ruby.. if you have problems with your BF, find another one who likes big chested fat girls, end of story.

Ruby,
Some women on here like to put others down… makes them feel better about themselves I’m guessing.
To me, this is a totally valid question and one that could definitely see my girlfriends and me dissecting over a glass of wine! That’s what girlfriends do. I’ve been called voluptuous and I’m a size 2 or 4. I took it to mean that I am curvy, feminine and sexy and felt it was a compliment. I think it means he likes your body and thinks you are sexy. He is probably not aware that it can be construed by some as fat. Take the compliment!

Katek, Everyone on her has already told her what you just told her and she wouldn’t accept it. Nobody was putting her down. I am voluptuous as well and I have been told that many times. It’s a matter of perspective. There is not much we can do if she has already made up her mind.

I agree with Kate-Ruby you DID get advice-most said we thought he was giving you a compliment-and men do not always think like women do. I doubt if he thought you were fat, that he would have said that-and you said he was a great guy before the “remark”. I urge you to step back and take a day or so and then read these pages-especially the first couple, again. You may see things more clearly then. You are coming off as a nut case at this point.

Ruby,

The most important opinion is the one you have of yourself.

I think he was trying to give you a compliment but, after all these pages you don’t see it as one.

I’m sorry to hear about you struggled with an eating disorder. Maybe it’s time to revisit seeking support. A simple word has caused a tail spin and I find that more alarming if anything.

Best of luck to you.