This topic contains 1 reply, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Lane 3 weeks, 5 days ago.
June 21, 2018 at 2:37 am #708984
So I’m dating this guy and every now and then he brings up things about his ex. He doesn’t do that often at all, and when he does it’s always to say how glad he is that things didn’t work out with her and how crazy she was. But the way he talks about her makes me feel like he’s not totally healed if that makes sense. He always brings up the fact that she started dating so qick after their breakup and so. It’s like this breakup still has a hold on him and that he didn’t let it go completely. There are about 4 years between her and me so it’s not recent at all, but I know he loved her… do you think he might not be over her?
There are no other signs at all… he’s very present with me and told me he loves me and sees a future with me. So I don’t know if I’m just feeling insecure about this when he talks about her or if I’m right to wonder…?
June 21, 2018 at 7:41 am #708992
Believe or not its not that uncommon for men, or women, to talk about their exes. I’ve experienced the same but when it comes to the point of wondering if their still hooked on them I will address such as “you sure do talk about your ex a lot, are you still in love or attached to her?” This directness throws them off at first but for some odd reason it works and find they stop talking about them.
I understand an ex, especially a long-term one or one who had a major part in one’s life can’t just be wiped away as if it it didn’t happen; however at some point their heart has to be ready for another woman to enter. If he still has a wall up then he’s not fully ready to take that leap of faith and that’s something you need to find out or you can get really hurt if you fall in love with a man who hasn’t fallen in love with you. I would definitely address it now because you don’t want to be blindsided when he all of sudden say’s “I’m not ready for anything serious” because you didn’t ask that critical question.
Also know there are a lot of FUTURE FAKERS out there so do not get hung up on their words; need to carefully observe all the actions behind them. WORDS + ACTIONS = TRUTH…if you have words and no actions, or actions and no words then your setting yourself up for potential heartache.