So confused


  • This topic has 3 replies and was last updated 2 years ago by Trixie.
Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #931742 Reply
    Mb325

    I met a guy on bumble, we talked roughly on there and exchanged numbers where we talked for about 4 more additional days. We talked, texted even FaceTimed. We went to dinner, dinner was amazing and then we went to see the Spider-Man movie. Our work schedules only allow us to space out when we would be able to get together. So anyway I talked to him today asking about getting together again he said no we had a great evening it was fun, but the connection on the phone and via text message was different than in person. I know it takes time to get to know someone and I barely go into dates now a days with no expectation, I’m just so confused as to why we went to the movies after dinner, you enjoyed the company but not necessarily me. Has this happened to anyone before? I just usually cut a date short when I don’t feel a connection why string someone along….

    #931743 Reply
    T from NY

    You may not like my advice but I promise it’s because I hear in your post a lot of what I used to feel… First of all about him (although I rarely think the way we’re feeling in the early stages of a relationship is about the guy) The majority of men go with the flow. They enjoy themselves and the company of an attractive, kind woman in the moment. Then, there is the old saying, men fall in love in your absence (unless of course they don’t).

    This guy was honest with you! It’s sad that honesty is a behavior that is stellar these days, but it is! How could you possibly be stressed at him for spending the time it took (for HIM) to know if he liked you or not? Stringing you along would have looked more like him agreeing to your invitation for another date, dropping hints he liked you, or future faking you, then sexing you and then peacing out! None of which he did.

    About you – I know you’re disappointed. YOU felt enough to move forward. Dating is truly challenging this day and age. I could be wrong, but I think A LOT of women displace their feelings of frustration and disappointment about the process, the amount of past trauma a lot of us have, the eagerness we have of having the NATURAL desire to WANT to be in a relationship, onto every tom, dick or harry we meet on a dating app.

    I get it, I get it. But we need to grow. Not project our hopes and aspirations onto a guy we BARELY know. It’s hard, but we’d do better to trust the universe. Trust that good things will come to us. Either in the shape of a lovely gentleman. Or in the shape of us practicing self-care and cultivating daily peace. You’ll be fine if you do these things. Never waste time trying to riddle out a man, or why he doesn’t want to date you. It serves no purpose as it has nothing to do with your worth or desirability. Be still. Tend to you. Release this one gently back to the universe.

    #931767 Reply
    Mb325

    Thank you! I needed to read this! That was the best advice I think I have heard, read in awhile. I appreciate it!

    #931797 Reply
    Trixie

    Falling in love does come in the spaces.

Viewing 4 posts - 1 through 4 (of 4 total)
Reply To: So confused
Your information:





<blockquote> <code> <pre> <em> <strong> <ul> <ol start=""> <li>