Random question about the "love" button on FB


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  • #534740 Reply
    Mary

    So I may stalk my ex’s facebook, I may not …

    But what does it mean when a woman from another state who has never met LOVES every single thing he posts. Not likes, loves. And now he is loving all her stuff too!

    Don’t tell me it means I have too much time on my hands and shouldn’t be looking. Everyone does it, but no one wants to admit it. I know he stalks mine too (he’s admitted it!!!)

    Just curious, thanks!

    #534751 Reply
    JB

    It means he loves everything she posts.
    It means she loves everything he posts.
    It means you have too much time on your hands.
    It means you should block him from all social media.
    It means he has moved on and you have not….

    #534756 Reply
    Raven

    Sorry Mary, you do have too much time on your hands.

    He’s your ex – please move on & find a new current…

    #534764 Reply
    Mary

    Ouch – I said not to tell me that! lol

    It’s fine – I get it. And yes he’s my ex, but he still contacts me even though I don’t respond. I know he will be back, and I just want to be armed with ammo enough to really mean my good bye this time. (some on here know the sordid story). I’ve accepted the fact that we will always love each other but in our case it’s not enough to make things work. We are literally the most opposite people that ever existed.

    Anyway, I read another comment on here that makes me think: I forget who said it, but he is just being fake nice to reel someone new in and then he will go back to his default settings. Best line ever. And oh so true. Believe it or not, I can’t wait for his next relationship so he can see or I can see, if you know what I mean.

    I was just curious what this meant too before I start loving people’s stuff. Because I am a “heart” fanatic but I think it means LOVE LOVE and not just more than like.

    #534796 Reply
    Phillygirl

    Not only are you stalking his FB, you are obsessing over it! Seriously, you are obsessing over what the heart icon on the like button means. TBH, it just means somebody loves a certain comment. But the thing with social media is, we never know how someone else interprets things.

    So lets say they use the heart button to mean they LOVE each other. Will that make you feel better?

    Here’s the deal. You don’t need to try to translate his social media activity (to know allowing him rent free room in your head and heart) is a waste of time.

    The only ammo you need to be armed with to mean your goodbye, is to know two aren’t going to work, you don’t belong together, and need to move on.

    You don’t need and “excuse”, all you need is the reality, this is over.

    #534820 Reply
    Mary

    He invited me to go away (meet him actually) over the holiday weekend coming up. Someone needs to remind him it’s over too! Guess that would be me. You’re right, we don’t work and never will. One of us needs to be strong enough. I just think of only the good and miss him everyday

    #534976 Reply
    MARY

    He JUST sent me the lyrics to The Dance by Garth Brooks. “I could have missed the pain but then I would’ve missed the dance” omg for real.

    I’m the one in pain, not him. This is his doing not mine. is he just playing games again? how strong am I supposed to be!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can’t

    #534988 Reply
    Raven

    Why did you two break up?

    #535015 Reply
    Mary

    He’s 40, feels like he messed his life up by not having kids and being a party boy and making bad decision after bad decision. Not really career minded, lives at home or crashes with friends, pretty much not painting a good picture but I see so much more to him. I’m almost 50, have grown kids, a home, a great career, tons of friends, and am happy happy happy with myself. He says he loves me but he doesn’t want to hurt me and if he wants kids someday I cant give him that. Plus he’s a narcissist, selfish, opinionated, has addiction issues, self confidence problems, no real connections to speak of, etc.
    So why do I want him? Because the deepness of our connection defies logic and I can’t let that go. I know I have to but I can’t. I am trying so hard, that’s why I keep coming on here for moral support. My new motto is this “what can he do for me?” and the answer is nothing, except make me feel alive. And that’s enough for me, but it shouldn’t be because I will become tired of that once it’s steady. If he can’t/won’t step up to grow up and be a happy man then he is useless to anyone, especially me who won’t settle for BS.
    It’s the quintessential “seeing what I want to see in him and not what’s really there”. I know that. I understand that. BUT, I can’t let it go. I feel we are destined to be together.
    I have been dating someone casually for 5 months who is great, and I should put more thought into that than this, but someone needs to remind my heart :(

    #535016 Reply
    Mary

    Bottom line, when I am with him I feel like I AM HOME. How can I shake that feeling?

    #535018 Reply
    Eric Charles
    Keymaster

    When you realize… really realize… that you can’t control what other people are going to do or not do…

    And moreover, when you realize what they do or don’t do fundamentally has nothing to do with you…

    You stop trying to analyze what’s going on in their head and start making your OWN mood and OWN life your priority…

    Nobody else is going to make you happy.

    Nobody else is going to make you feel complete.

    Nobody else is going to make you feel at-peace with life.

    You are already whole and complete and don’t NEED anything from another person in order to feel OK.

    Yes, there are great and wonderful things we can share with others, but your sense of OK-ness is found from within… not through what another person does or doesn’t do.

    “Live into” your life and give others the space to live their lives.

    #535038 Reply
    Mary

    @ ERIC CHARLES – I don’t know whether I should be honored that you answered my post, or ashamed because I must be in pretty bad shape for you to feel you had to! LOL, but thanks Eric … means a lot.

    I don’t know how people go thru divorces. I am a widow and thought that was hard, but knowing someone you love, who loves or loved you, is out there walking around this earth – it’s torture!

    But, just like I’ve always told my divorcing friends who say my situation is so much worse, they are both endings; the only difference is I KNOW I can’t change anything, but they still THINK they can.

    Appreciate you and this site. I believe you help a lot of people who don’t know where to go — or whose friends are tired of hearing them! (ME!)

    XO

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