This topic contains 4 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Lane 6 months, 2 weeks ago.
December 6, 2017 at 5:33 pm #671314
we have been split for 3 weeks but kept in contact. on Sunday we spoke on the phone and yesterday and today we met up. today he was holding my hand and kissing me telling me he loved me and things were great. I asked him if we was now back together and he said yes we are working things out. I asked him how things are going to work now he has started working weekends and I’m working in the week and he said he didn’t know then he said that he had been telling me for weeks that he couldn’t give me what I wanted but I was ok with that. he also told me he wouldn’t be spending new years eve with me as he was working. he has taken off next weekend to go out with his mate and I asked him about taking time off so we could go out and he said he doesn’t know. I started crying and he walked away from me in town. I then got a text saying that he loved me but couldn’t give me what I want and he’s been pushing me away for weeks for that reason but he’s happy to leave things there as he wants me to be happy. I was so upset I cried all the way home on the train and I blocked him I didn’t respond I feel so gutted. should I keep him blocked?…kinda think I over reacted.
December 6, 2017 at 6:27 pm #671319
I think you need to stay out of contact for a few months.
I’m sure you are thinking that sounds drastic but, you really need time to heal.
He has said it over and over again he cannot give you what you want.
That meeting was probably because he missed you but, he had no real plans to settle what the issues were in your relationship.
Many years ago I had an ex that I went back to so many times. We’d meet up things would be good for a short while and then we’d be back to square one. I would be even worse off each time we broke things off.
One day I finally told him that either we sit down and have a real discussion on what our future was and how we’d get there or I never wanted to hear from him again.
Well that didn’t go well with him and we haven’t spoke since. Years later I see that moment as one of the best things I ever did for myself. Granted it wasn’t easy but, I eventually go over it.
He needs to be willing to really make things work or he cannot be in your life.December 6, 2017 at 8:51 pm #671328
Honey he is telling you the truth. He can’t give you what you want or deserve. He wants to see you on HIS convenience. He will take time off for his friends but not you. It is all as bad as it seems. You must go no contact for 6 months if you want to move on.December 7, 2017 at 4:27 am #671380
I just feel drained. he’s one way then another I get mixed signals I got a text saying it doesn’t have to be this way this morning followed by everything was fine yesterday why did we go back and ruin things everything was fine. I havnt responded I don’t even know what to sayDecember 7, 2017 at 6:33 am #671398
Tell him “we’re not on the same page. You want something casual and I’m looking for my partner in crime. I’m tired of the merry-go-round or you treating me like a yo-yo and I’m done. Good luck in life…bye” Short, simple, and too the point!
Need to learn how to stand up for yourself and tell men like him to pound sand. Doing it this way will increase your confidence and give you the power to end things permanently when its come to an end. Next time stay out of contact and never take less than what you really want—be true to yourself at all times as it will make it easier for you to say NEXT if a man isn’t on the same page you are. Go to youtube and watch “these boots were made for walking…” (by Nancy Sinatra) it will lift you up a bit :o)