This topic contains 5 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by LAgirl 5 months, 4 weeks ago.
October 23, 2013 at 10:03 am #42770
I had been seeing this guy for about a month and a half. He was always calling me, texting me, doing anything to see me. I could tell he was very much into me. I was the one in the beginning that wasn’t sure if I wanted to be with him.he had finally asked the question for me to be committed in a relationship with him. For about a month he was the same way, always calling me, texting me, and wanting to be with me. All of a sudden he got a call to interview for a job.long story short he got the job, but they don’t know where to put him… in the same city or another one across the country. After he had told me he could potentially move, I questioned him if he would leave if given the opportunity. Naturally he said yes, I wasn’t too happy and I was stressing about it because now I had fallen for the guy.Well now, he doesn’t text me as much, or call me as much and he is not hanging out with me as much anymore. When we are together though, everything is fine, but when we are apart he seems more distant than he used to be. Sometimes I want to send him cute texts like good morning, or miss u (when he’s travelling) but I’m afraid to come off as needy and I want him to be more responsive like he used to be. Should I back off and give him space and let him come to me? Or should I keep calling him first or texting him first?October 23, 2013 at 10:06 am #42772
Btw he had been acting like this for two weeksOctober 23, 2013 at 10:52 am #42781
He is likely backing off because he knows this relationship is not going to last. When he moves, he isnt seeing a future with you.
Definitely do not keep calling or initiating contact with him. If he wants to talk/spend time with you, he will initiate it.
At this point you need to consider what YOU want. Do you want to keep seeing a man who will shortly be moved and gone from your life?
One of the most important things about relationships is ‘timing.’ Sometimes a relatinship is just not meant to be due to timing. In this case, his career comes before dating. He is making a decision that he knows is important to his future. You and he are not in a relationship and therefore it is easy for him to decide what is in his best interest.
Men are different than women this way. A woman will turn herself inside to try to stay with a man – even when she barely knows him. A man, if he is not fully invested in her, will make the decision that is most important to HIM.
Put yourself first. He is doing what is important to his future. You should focus on your future and what is important for you. And please… do not consider moving to his new location unless you truly intended to move there for yourself, in the first placeOctober 23, 2013 at 12:16 pm #42789
Well we have been in an official relationship for about two months. And we still don’t know if he is being relocated our not.. I mean it’s driving me nuts that he has so 180 changed.do you think he is gearing up to break up? But he always talks as if he we aren’t going to break up. So I’m so confused on what’s going on in his head and how to respond. I know he is constantly on his phone, so when he doesn’t respond to a text for hours it bothers me because 9 times out of 10 he saw it…October 23, 2013 at 2:04 pm #42816
LAgirl just told you…
He’s backing off because he might be moving.
He’s concentrating on his future and you should be concentrating on yours.
Two months is nothing – 8 weeks!
So you didn’t even know this guy in what, August?
Go back to what you were doing in August. You can keep seeing him if you want to, but you need to focus on your OWN life.
If it turns out he’s not moving, he might start showing interest again. But then again, this whole incident may have made him reevaluate career versus girlfriend – and as LA said, career will always win out with a guy.October 23, 2013 at 4:13 pm #42836
Let’s put it this way, Stephanie.
If he DOES end up moving? How do you envision staying together with him?