He read my message and didn't reply


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  • #656144 Reply
    Lol what?

    Wow. Not even gonna sugar coat it.
    You’re a psycho.

    I’d hate to see how you react when real problems arise. Maybe you should break it off and give him a chance to be with a stable woman.

    Then work on yourself and blah, blah, blah.

    #656152 Reply
    Lane

    I’m so gladness I have a patient BF because if he reacted the way you are we wouldn’t not be together! I own a business and he knows how busy I am and has nevertheless once held it agains t me when I haven’t responded in a timely manner which is often lol.

    I think you really need to chill out me unwind. This is super minor whereas if you wanted to see him why not COMMUNICATE that to him???? I don’t think you would have been fun or pleasant be around and maybe he’s feeling that’s negative energy.

    #656175 Reply
    Tori

    OMG The drama! This is why men walk out on women. One unanswered text and you are blowing it out of proportion. Grow up and work on your self. You are obviously too insecure and you are making your life revolve around him. Get a life of your own!

    #656177 Reply
    Hannah

    He probably just forgot. You’re 9 months into a relationship, it’s not chasing to send another message.

    It’s happened with my husband and I loads of times, plus all my friends and family, that I’ve forgotton to reply. Sometimes I’ve even thought I had and wondered why I heard nothing back. When I’ve checked, I’d planned to reply but got side tracked and hadn’t actually done it!

    Don’t create drama for no reason. Kusy send him another message. If he doesn’t reply to that, you have a problem!

    #656188 Reply
    Anon

    Um… in the really really old dating world, no one would flip out over this instance.

    Perhaps you may want to read on what is more important in an early relationship than paying attention or upset with this tiny incident

    #656271 Reply
    Gemma

    Well it’s 24 hours since and I have heard nothing

    #656274 Reply
    Jose

    Gemma, give him one more day and if you still havent heard anything, then text him “Hey are you okay? I asked you a question, if you didnt have time you could have said so instead of ignoring me” and then leave it at this. Yes it sounds mad, but its also fair. You asked him a question and if he doesnt answer within one-two day(s), then you have all right to be mad.
    Since you two have been dating for 9 months its very unlikely he will “ghost” on you, unless he is going through some deep sh*t. Then he will tell you what in a week or so.
    I know its hard, but try doing something else. You cant force him to answer him, all you can do is telling him how you feel, and let him do the rest.
    Try not to think about it too much.

    #656277 Reply
    Jose

    But that said, he isnt required to answer if he simply doesnt want to. If he has other stuff on his mind, then he could tell you “Sorry, is it okay if I answer later?” or something. But its kinda rude that he doesnt answer at all after 1-2 days, since you two have been dating this long time.
    So give him either tonight or tomorrow, and then write to him. If he still doesnt answer, then forget about him.

    #656294 Reply
    Ann

    Well, patience is the key…

    #656302 Reply
    Gemma

    Jose Thank you, it’s very strange, this the longest he ever went without contacting me.

    Me and him never went through the “pulling away” stage so maybe he is doing that now.

    But yeah I will give him until Monday morning.

    #656307 Reply
    peggy

    Gemma-I will repeat what I said-you claim to be in a close,9 months long relationship-yet you freak at one missing text and for some reason,don’t just text and call and either act normal /casual or ask if he is okay. It makes zero sense to me that you don’t directly contact him-why the games. It is not like you have been dating for two weeks ..

    #656311 Reply
    Gemma

    peggy because I don’t want to encourage him ignoring myself and me going after him.

    Yes we been dating that long but still we have long way to go so I don’t want get use to him disrespecting me like that.

    I’m not gonna let him off very easily if he does not contact me by this evening with a good reason . If it’s me who cantacts him again, I will let him know how I feel and I don’t care if sees me as crazy

    #656313 Reply
    gofp

    Gemma, you have the right to feel however you want to feel and you have the right to choose whatever action you deem appropriate for you. I would just ask that you do it from a place of understanding. e.g. Do you 100% know that he intended to ignore you? Do you think there is any valid reason to ignore a text? Do you think there is any reason you might not reply to someone’s text right away, or at all?

    It seems you may be reaching conclusions based on faulty assumptions. Once the words “It’s over” come out of your mouth, it’s too late to rethink your assumptions. Do it now before you make that choice.

    #656321 Reply
    Kat

    chillllllla give the guy his space, i know how you feel my boyfriend is like that too but i give him his time to think and react, and you saying you wanna curse at him, cut him off, delete him makes you a bad girlfriend, you need to realize not everything will go your way so stop acting childish and grow up, he is a man he can take care of himself, he doesn’t need to automatically answer.

    #656327 Reply
    Algo

    Sometimes I’m busy and I reply when I can, that can take a few hrs. I will however still reply the people I need to communicate with in order to do the things I’m busy with. That’s what text communication is for, you can get back when you can/want.

    Sometimes I type a message and forget to hit ‘send’. It happens. Jeez.

    #656331 Reply
    Jose

    Its okay that you dont get a text right away, even for hours! But guys, she said its been over 24 hours since she sent that text. I mean he could have forgotten to send the text the first 10-15 hours, but over 24? Nah, I dont buy that.

    #656333 Reply
    Gemma

    Exactly Jose it’s not even about the text anymore , it’s the fact he has not contact me this long.

    And he is active online. So I know he is well.

    #656335 Reply
    Anon

    Not want to encourage him? That thought was nonsense

    If you and he has the same mind set , this relationship will doom to fail

    I would suggest you to wise up and start reading on emotional intelligence to get ahead and follow up with negotiation skills to jump start your relationship

    Best of luck

    #656336 Reply
    Oh

    I am usually very good with multitasking but when I see the text msg on the way to the public transportation station, or just purely walking around, or busy I completely forget. Then I can forget for more than a day. Unless it was very important question that determines life and death I would just assume he forgot. I think you are overreacting. I am sure many of my friends and guys I have been dating would have ran away if they showed same reaction as you do. Relax. Chill. Life is not all about text.

    #656337 Reply
    redcurleysue

    If this is out of character I can understand why you are upset. But, why he is not responding is still up in the air for me. There could be multiple reasons but you have grabbed unto disrespect.

    Once we tell ourselves a story like this automatically there is anger involved. I suggest to you that you “wonder” why he has not responded…find out and then respond.

    If everything has been good then there is a very good reason to give a benefit of a doubt. Do not play games please. Just call the man (not text) and tell him straight out that you wondered why he did not respond to you….then listen carefully.

    #656340 Reply
    Jose

    I think you should follow redcurleysue’s advice. I know I told you to “wait a day or so”, but if this keeps being in your head, you should just go right to the core :)

    #656345 Reply
    Honeypie

    Ummm… sorry I simply don’t believe your story here. You paint a picture of wonderment and happy contentness for three quarters of a year, and then everything falls apart because he hasn’t answered a text? And you are now stalking him see when he’s online or on social media etc…. and now you are basically stating you’re intentions to ignore him and not let him off the hook etc If and when he does contact, and you aren’t going to contact him so as not to encourage bad behaviour- what are you? Ten?
    I would hazard a guess that his take on your relationship is very different to yours. I would place a bet actually, that you are demanding, uncompromising, immature in your general conduct in relationships and have utterly unrealistic expectations. He likely finds you full on and oppressive and you appear to want a whipping boy.
    Seriously maybe he isn’t contacting you because he needs an needs break?
    This likely all sounds harsh to you and far from your reality as you perceive it, but seriously you need a reality check with a reaction like this in the context of the picture you paint.

    #656381 Reply
    Emma

    I asked my HB about your situation Gemma. His take on it is this is not ok that your BF did not reply and especially that he did not contact you for 24 hrs. But he said do not be a baby about it. Confront him directly and tell him directly that you felt disrespected and manipulated. That if something was wrong he should have talked to you and not stonewalled you.

    Do not make this one issue crack your relationship. Try to tone it down, ask him why you haven’t heard from him, it is out of character and why he can’t talk to you. but do not accuse him and do not text a lot, simply ask. And then give him half a day to think about it. He maybe have been harbouring some anger or some frustration that you were not aware of, so give him a chance to cool off and think about it.

    #656386 Reply
    Linda

    Gemma, before jumping to conclusions and being angry at this guy have you considered calling him and figuring out what’s going on? communication is key in any relationship and being angry because he read the text message and has been online for four hours is not the best way to communicate in a relationship. there can be so many reasons why he didn’t answer your message. At this point you are just making assumptions and created in your own mind the reason why he didn’t reply to your message. talk to the guy, you guys are in a good place. You will get a better feeling about him if you talk to him on the phone.

    #656408 Reply
    Pandora

    I have to say I am on the fence, if this is a fake post or not

    but reading all the posts, I now have to ask:
    how you usually agree on dates? I mean, you wrote him an “invitation” to see you…. and he didnt respond and DIDNT plan anything for the weekend

    which is okey, but that is my question: how you arrange your dates? how much in advance? how often you two see each other?

    do you live nearby or is it long-distance?

    Do you have established habits when you meet or not meet on a weekend?

    After 9 “amazing” months together, how comes, you dont know what he is up to in the weekend? Or that if you even going to meet him on the weekend? Or was it always a “given” you see each other on the weekend, and that is why you are so angry?

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