Ending my life…

Are you ok? It will get better. I promise. Almost tow years ago a person I thought was the love of my life broke up with me suddenly. For a very long time I could not breath. I had to remind myself each day to eat. I cried all of the time. I could not work. My friends helped but I could not stop the pain. I prayed very much each day and and would use stop thought to move past if I was thinking of him or saying bad things about myself in my mid. It took a long time to feel better and each day i did. Now I don’t think of him at all. If i see a photo of us that I forgot I had I feel as though it was another life. I thought I could not live another minute when it happened but I did and life is better than I imagined now. Please do not harm yourself. Life will always get better.

How are you feeling now Ms Sorrow? I really hope that, even though you feel desperately terrible, that you no longer want to give up?

You mentioned getting a new job and that’s a positive, forward thinking step to take! It takes a lot if strength and courage to even think of doing anything active when you feel in a mess, so well done!

While we can help and be there for you as much as we can, actually being able to talk to someone can be so much more helpful. I imagine you have more problems than just this man? I really think counselling or therapy would help, especially if your friends are tired of listening. I had a friend who was sectioned with depression and they taught him so many coping skills and new ways of thinking. It changed his life for the better. So there is always help and hope!

You were SMART to come here and ask for help. It makes a huge difference when 10-15 women with dramatic personal experiences tell you what they think and what they think might help. Every person would tell you something that others won’t. It is very valuable. I had a very painful experience where I came close to your state and I wish I knew about this forum.

In my experience friends just say they are sorry and try to make you feel better but they seldom say something that makes a difference in how you look at the situation. Maybe because they, are too involved in a situation. For people from the outside, especially with similar experiences, it is easier to see things for what they are.

Just keep telling yourself that your future is what matters. You will recover from this one experience and when you look back you will be proud of yourself. I often say that life is a jungle, there are beasts in there, we need to look out for ourselves, we can’t expect people to be nice and decent. Many, often even those close to us, will hurt us, and hurt us badly, so we need to look out for ourselves.

Come here and post your updates. Do whatever you think might make you feel better. Do not be shy. If calling help line is going to help you, then call. Talk to your relatives, to your family, they will be the ones to really care about you. But above all – try to remove yourself from the painful conditions. Try to move out for 2-3 months if at all possible. Preferably, permanently.

Think of YOU, and not anyone else, whatever makes YOU feel better – do it. Look after YOURSELF and your interests. Protect yourself. Nourish yourself. You need to heal yourself heal. It is not easy, it will take work on your part.

Please please keep us posted, give us some updates, so that we know you are better, you are much better already, so inch by inch, you will be getting better every day.

Love and support to you!!!

What are you going to do now? When you sober up, you need to get on the phone to a crisis line or get to the hospital and get in the process of getting long term support. Drinking won’t solve it sweetheart. We care for you here but we are not professionals and you need professional assistance and possibly medication to get yourself stabilized. It won’t change by itself – you can’t do it alone and we can’t be proper therapists.

Yes, it is great to have support, I often wish when I was in the hospital I had gotten that, no, my family pretty much did not care, my mom did but she is a terribly difficult person who threw fits at me even at the hospital. When you have family that greatly helps. At least I had friends that cared deeply. Still, nothing will replace professional help. That as well as support from family members are really important.

Now I told you my story about my ex fiancee but January this year my ex husband attempted to kill me. I have tried to have him go away but nothing helped. He was getting more and more mental, as in seriously mental. I survived because I was lucky, I accidentally had my phone in my robe when I ran out in the cold and I could call for help. But no one helped me. The police did not help me. The whole thing turned against me almost and made me financially broke because my ex husband also stole a lot of my money in addition to what it cost me legally to fight.

He came back here for weeks, he was torturing me, he tried to climb through the basement and at least my mom was always on the phone but she was not willing to come here as she said that I had to go through it alone. I slept every night not knowing if I will wake up the next morning. Fortunately, weeks later at least an investigation started which stopped him but then he abused me at work and tried to harrass me and make moves on me, either clinging to me physically or being aggressive. I felt so relieved when he was out of my life.

You can survive a lot, more than you think, what has been the most difficult to me is one: when I was betrayed by my ex fiancee and two: how the system does not help victims.

But I said to myself that no matter what happens being alive is the most important thing and believe me that it is. The process took a toll on me, I have had everything; tonsillitis from a regrown tonsil, gum infection leading to rejection of dental implant, further infection, now since August I have battled with colitis ulcerosa or Crohn flareup. I try but it is hard.

Drinking is a really bad idea. It may also ruin your stomach, it did mine even though I never drank heavily or all the time. Medication is better. A glass of wine may not hurt but drinking nonstop will make you not be able to think clearly. At a hospital they will not let you drink, this helps. Medication and alcohol can be really dangerous.

I still urge you to choose help. You are on the road to recovery no matter how long that road is once you recognize that you have a serious problem which will require help. Generally when you escape from the problem and do not seek help, it will only get worse with time or may resurface with a vengeance.

Ms. Sorrow – good to know that you are surrounded by family and friends. Keep it up. Drink if you feel like it. it will get better, day by day. You might go in cycles, up and down, but overall, it will be getting better and better.

Keep us posted on how you feel and what you were able to do about being in the same building.

YOU is what matters now, think about yourself, protect yourself.

Hello everyone!
Stefanie,CC, Maria, SthrnBelle,Michele, Kaye, Phillygirl, Jessica, Miss independent, Hannah,Justme,Leila and Max
THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT AND KIND WORDS..I feel better now, I reread all your comments just now after I wake up, i feel rested. You have no idea how much you helped me. Words are not enough to thank you all.

Dear Maria
Thank you! I feel how much you worried for me. You never leave to get update about what happened. Thank you for staying and trying your best to give the best advice as you can. I appreciate this VERY MUCH. When you asked about my number, I feel how much you are worried. Sorry if I didn’t for some reason. Hugs for you, thank you.

Dear Jenny
Thank you very much! I feel you are a happy person and I’m glad, thank you for a very comforting and kind words from you.

Dear Jessica
Thank you! You are like a sister from a distance. I was just a silly girl who came here to open my emotion and you came to give comfort. I feel I’m not alone with having you all.

Dear Ms.Sorrow, I’m soo glad you are feeling better! That’s what the sisterhood us for – us girls need to stick together! I am relieved for you and hope that you are able to recover and thrive in the future!

I truly hope you do take all of our advice and go you your doctor and find a therapist to help you deal with your depression. Breakups can be hard, but they don’t always have to make you feel like you want to give up. It will help you to get yourself feeling better generally so that you can deal with hard times like you are titanium. Until then you have all of us! Please please call and talk, or post and talk to us if you are feeling down. We aren’t experts but we can all empathize with how your are feeling.

Remember that being happy is the best revenge! We want you to be genuinely happy!

Sorrow, your ex… he’s not a good person. He’s not worth your heartache and suffering. It’s his loss and you’re soo much better off without him.

Please, try to focus on that way of thinking, because it’s true and the only way of thinking that will lift you up.

Also focus on taking care of and healing yourself.

Re your job… the best thing you can do is to walk in there, hold your head high and treat him like air.

You will meet a much better guy one day in the future. Someone who loves and wants to be with you and treats you with respect. I promise. Focus on the thought and hope of that – focus on the positive, cause that is the best and quickest way back to life, health and happiness.

Good luck and keep us posted, honey <3

Alcohol is a depressant. It can make you feel a warm buzz for a short while if you don’t drink a lot. After that, it’ll make you feel a whole lot worse. And hangovers are depressing in themselves!

If you feel you need something to help you cope, the doctor can prescribe something that will give you the “I don’t care” quite as much feeling without the massive down. You may only need it for a week or two. But try not to drink too much. It will lower your inhibitions and make you feel more desperate, not better.