Home › Forums › Texting Advice › Does this warrant a response?
- This topic has 19 replies and was last updated 5 years, 12 months ago by
Mouk.
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Samantha
I’ll keep it short. This guy and I have a complicated history.
I had a perfect opportunity to meet up with him though, chat, catch up, etc., and he blew me off. He texted me the last night of said opportunity at 9 pm and said he was very sorry he didn’t get back to me, had a crazy busy week, asked how my day went.
I told him my day was fine, but then just said “are we done here? I wanted to try to work things out with you but you don’t seem to want to give me the chance.” Mind you neither of us ever officially ended things.
I sent him that last night, he responded a few hours ago and said “i’ll get in touch soon. I’m not avoiding your question, I’m just getting my ass kicked by work and I don’t feel well.”Now I know how everyone will respond: he’s an ass, he’s not interested, why are you trying.
Just save it.MY response was I am pissed off and tired of being jerked around and given the “I’m so busy” excuse, even if he genuinely is busy.
All I want to know is, should I respond to his last text, and if so what should I say?
Again, while I appreciate any and all advice on here, I’m really just looking for an answer to that question.
Em
Don’t respond. Any time a guy is blowing you off (which you seem to already know he is) it never requires a response.
Samantha
Thanks, Em.
I kind of feel that that’s what’s right.
I also don’t even know what I’d say in response, he knows everything now about how I feel.Ashley
Don’t respond
Lucy
Men don’t respond to words.. . You show with actions. Your actions show him he can walk all over you. And your complaining means nothing to him, as evidenced by his actions. Profound huh?
Samantha
Thanks, everyone.
I didn’t think about it like that, Lucy. What’s sad is I was actually worried for a minute that he would think my no response was rude, meanwhile he’s been blowing me off.
Lucy
… And she emerged from the darkness..xxx
Teri
his last text was an action required on his part…..”I’ll get in touch soon…”
hence the ball is in his court, not yours hence not warranting a response. There was no question asked.
Samantha
Ooooo, good point Teri.
I just can’t believe that I’m trying to end the stringing along, and yet I’m still being strung along through my efforts.
Khadija
This guy is clearly blowing you off. I’m not sure what response you should have to his text.
Please go be busy living your fabulous life and don’t spend another minute worrying about this man.
Men are never too busy to get something or someone they truly want.A.
Don’t respond. You already know he’s not interested. Don’t ever give attention to a guy who’s not into you. It would just make you look pathetic and desperate if you said anything to him. In the future, don’t ask a guy “what are we doing.” If he is into you, you will know and you won’t have to ask. If you have to ask, it’s not gonna work out and you should walk away without lowering yourself.
kaye
I wouldn’t respond either. Agree with Teri that he kept the ball in his court with I’ll get in touch soon…not avoiding the question. Therefore you should simply wait for him to get back to you.
However, if you do want to respond I think a “Sorry to hear that…hope things get better soon” text is an an adequate response.
Teri
I had a guy do something like this to me not long ago and had to come here to this forum for some schooling. He was always (since we met) kinda vague in his texting, used ‘canned phrases’ void of any emotion. when I was tryna test the water to see if he wanted to be with me only as long as I came over on my off nights I found out his true color.
I tol him I wasn’t free for a few weeks due to schedule changes with my childcare but we could always meet for lunch since he’s met me before and doesn’t live far from my job.
His reply caused me to come to this forum. all he replied was ‘sounds good or I’ll let you know”. then I waited…….waited………….a week went by and nothing.
However, when I did text n tell him I’m free Tuesday night, he was blowing up the phone with calls and texts to find out what time I’d be over………..I later told him I had to cancel and the texting, stopped abruptly. Needless to say I had my answer. LOLIt was my way of testing what I didn’t want to believe to be true and gosh darnit he passed with flying colors.
Samantha
I mean at this point I think it might be a little late to respond, he sent these messages on Monday (two days ago) afternoon. I’m okay with having not responded.
It just sucks that he’s not interested/I’m not a priority for him because a few months ago he would have dropped everything to see me.Samantha
He never got back to me. Guess that’s that.
Samantha
Hey all
Sorry if I’m beating a dead horse about this, but it’s been two weeks and “getting in touch soon” doesn’t seem to be in the cards. Should I just assume I’m never going to hear from him again?
Raven
Yes…
Remove his number from your phone & move forward …
Don’t wait on this douchetard…Mary J
Me and my friend has been involved off and on for about 20 years and last year we finally decided to start a relationship. It started great but I am in a relationship that I was ending for him. I got Good morning, calls, love u text and all, but he wanted more too soon. He wanted me to travel to see him, he wanted me to video chat, and he expected to just call me out the blue and when I didn’t answer he gets upset. Too say the least I fell in love and after not leaving my ex and not traveling to my long time friend like he requested..he slowly cut me off. No text, unless I text first. Short one order text and then because of all this I ended the relationship. A month has passed and I texted him..Hey there, hope all is well..and he did not respond, after we have been friends forever. Should I not text him again.
Thanks
Raven
If he was so hot to go, why didn’t he come to You?!
Mouk
my advice in the future is to just be honest with how YOU feel… “I really enjoy your company, and was hoping to talk to you tonight, but I feel like this is not working out.” or “I am disappointed that you rung me up and then backed out, and I feel like this is not going anywhere.” never ask “so what now?” – don’t give him the power to decide what you are doing! he has to put in effort.
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