am I expecting too much contact?


Home Forums Texting Advice am I expecting too much contact?

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  • #942738 Reply
    Celina

    Hi,
    I just wanted to ask for your opinion please.
    I have been with boyfriend for over a year now and since the beginning he was not allowed to have a phone at work, so we did not communicate during the day but we were seeing each other 2-3 times a week so it wasn’t really an issue for me.
    He has now moved to a different location for work and lives 3h away , so we don’t see each other as much. Not only that he has a very demanding job where he works from 9am till 7pm most days. He can have a work at phone and he has been messaging here and there but very short messages like he didn’t want to be disturbed.
    He phones me most days on his way home and we chat for about an hour , sometimes less. But I just feel like this isn’t enough for me. I am not sure if I am being needy or is it normal to expect more from someone who has a busy job ?
    At the same time I know that being 3h we don’t really have a lot to talk about , so it is probably more a validation thing for me but it is starting to bother me.

    #942742 Reply
    Maddie

    He is still calling you daily and giving you an hour of his day despite working 10 hour days also. It is totally reasonable that he can’t speak to you much or at all while he’s working. The actual problem is, it doesn’t sound like a long distance relationship works well for you. And they are hard for anyone! How often are you seeing each other now? Are there any plans to live closer to each other again? If this is permanent, that you have 3 hours of distance and no plan to be close again, then you may want to discuss your overall needs in a relationship and where things can go from here.

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