There’s this guy at work that was pursuing me since last November. We’re so similar that it is scary. Just random things he will say or I will say we always have the same views. He used to joke that I was his twin who was separated at birth or his future wife. Anyways it started as just a joke and then I think he actually developed feelings for me and started asking me out. I was hesitant and told him that I had dated people I worked with before and it always ended up going sour and I don’t want to go through that. He told me “life is what it is and things happen for a reason. You just haven’t met the right person.” Anyway, he kept pursuing me an I finally gave in and we went on out first date in March.

It was lots of fun and I never really felt I connected with someone like this before. I didn’t feel like I had to impress him, I was myself. We would go to lunch together and he would try to sneak kissed when no one was looking. We were seeing each other like that for about two months until we slept together the first time. I made the mistake of asking him if there was a future for us. I wasn’t asking for a relationship, I just wanted to know that there could be because I dated this other guy for two and half years and he never committed. Anyway, this new guy also asked me to do something in the bedroom and I said no.

After that he started to become distant and when I confronted him about it he said that I did two things that turned him off. The first was that I talked about having relationship too soon and the other was that ‘you never say no in the bedroom.’ I told him that I understand that he felt this way but I am not a mind reader, and you should tell me or tell the person you are with when you are turned off. He told me “it was a no brainer.”

Read on for the rest of this question and our guy’s response after the jump [Click to continue reading…]

Tagged as: commitment, dating advice, dating tips, ex acting like a jerk, gender psychology, how to deal with an ex, relationship advice, relationship tips, Relationships, understanding men

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